ONE WITH HIS BROTHER

By: Norberto Betita 

Challenges comes to each of us in surprisingly unexpected time and stretch of life. It comes even during the early beat of life in an embryonic stage---when the formation of the major organs and structure of a growing embryo takes place---and some parts failed to develop.

Such was the case of my tenth grandchild---Trevor Betita Preciosa---now two years old. During his conception it was already observed through ultrasound that one of his kidneys did not grow. However, the fetal movement and development as observed were within normal condition. The baby was eventually given birth normally and his newborn screening revealed no other early signs of abnormalities, except for that of his kidney of which his pediatrician advised the parents to consult with a Pediatric Nephrologist.

What makes this challenge kind of surprising and strange to the family is the fact that the infant boy is one with his brother---Travis---who was also diagnosed as being born with one kidney by the same obstetrician who delivered both children about five years apart. Of the elder boy, the parents did not take immediate action to consult with a nephrologist observing that he was just as normal as all other boys his age. He had never been to a pediatrician often except for ordinary common coughs and colds.

However, with their newborn having the same kidney deficiency, after six months from birth, they brought both children to Butuan City for checkup by a pediatric nephrologist. The examination confirmed that both were indeed born with only one left kidney each, a condition called renal agenesis. Their right kidneys did not develop. They were assured though that these boys can live healthy normal lives and with normal life span. They were advised, however, to live healthy lifestyles as possible. 

As a grandfather, I am very grateful to know that Trevor and his brother Travis, despite both having only one kidney each, can still do things that normal children are doing. Notwithstanding the possibility that later in life there will be slight loss of kidney functions, it has been proven that the loss of function will be very mild with very few problems. They still can participate in sports except for those which requires heavy body contacts as advised by doctors. They need not have to follow a special diet if their single kidney remains healthy. As it has been said that “it is not unusual for one kidney to do the work of two.”

Statistics say that 1 in 750 people is born with only one kidney. The origin and cause of renal agenesis---born with one kidney--- is not yet known. It is said that most of these cases “are not inherited from parents, nor do they result from any behavior by the mother.” However, it can be “more common in infants born to one or more parents with malformed or absent kidney.”

We do not have any recorded history in the family of this kind of physical deficiency. Their parents had no known malformed or absent kidneys, they having been conceived and born when the ultrasound technology was not yet available. They live healthy normal lives. However, in their father’s side, their grandmother’s siblings have history of kidney problems.

As of the now both boys are observed to be just as healthy and active as many children their age. They have not been to a doctor often. 

Trevor and his brother Travis are just beginning their life’s race. There are yet so many laps to cross and high roads of challenges to overcome. The path to the future are for them totally uncertain. They need to have faith even early in life, for after all, these challenges and uncertainties are made part of their mortal journey because Heavenly Father knows and trusts in their capacity to triumph over their designated trials as they ask Him for help.

I am old and I may not see Trevor---my 10th grandson---grow into maturity. It is my hope and most sincere prayer that he will be guided through by his parents in love and patience and in righteousness and in truth. May he grows and develops into a virtuous man, strong in faith, and more spiritually inclined. May Heavenly Father grant that he will be able to embrace his early adversities with courage to defy barriers and faith to endure. In his growing up years, may he understands better the purpose of life and the role of challenges in God’s eternal plan of happiness.

HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY 2ND BIRTHDAY TREVOR! As your grandfather, I have an overpowering wish that you will be able to live a full normal and healthy life; that you will grow learning the truths of life and the plan of salvation; that you will be obedient to your parents and to the commandments of God; and that you will qualify to hold the Holy Priesthood of God and serve in His kingdom and walk the path where Jesus walked. May God grant!

THE MIL-FRAN GASTA-BETITA FAMILY REUNION 2018

by: Norberto Betita

The surviving 8 out of 13

Our family reunion is a tradition that was conceived years ago out of our great love for our dearest parents Millan Guhiting Betita and Francisca Mangle Gasta Betita, of whose greatest sacrifice, all thirteen of us siblings were raised to maturity. We consider these moments of family gatherings as turning back our hearts to them in reciprocation of the great love they have showered upon us during those long years of admonishing and nurturing towards our becoming responsible grownups. It is likewise perceived to pass on the family legacy that our parents bequeathed to us, to the present as well as to the future generations. 

Through the years the roots of our family tree have grown deeper as to generate more and more branches growing in different directions. It has become so many that for us, the original branches, it’s becoming difficult to identify some of the tiny twigs.

The recent reunion scheduled April 7-9, 2018 registered 187 participants, not including those who were not able to participate because of distance. Our family relationships is a circle which is bound by the bonds of love that ever grow stronger through the increasing number of strands added by every marriage and birth of which the circle is likewise enlarged. 

At the beach

Our family is far from being perfect. Like all others, we have our own share of joys and gladness as well as sorrows and pains. We also have family crises as are common since the beginning of the families of Adam, Abraham, Jacob, Moses, Lehi and more. Among the many branches are saints and prodigals and personal differences which makes disagreements a common part. Yet when conflicts are faced in the spirit of family love, unity and harmony, there comes peace and the family circle is even strengthened and fortified.

What makes our family reunions different is the fact that it was built upon the principle that, “those who have, give. Those who have less, receive.” There is no counting of contributions, only sincere fulfillment of generous commitments. There is no measure to what each family gives for even the least that each could bring and the mere physical or personal presence is to us already an expression of boundless family love.

The weight of providing meals to 200 participants in the grand reunion was financially a heavy burden to bear. But one young single bough in the family tree volunteered hole-and-corner to shoulder the cost. However, out of unity, harmony and love, family members collectively shared added resources if only to lighten the load. Throughout the three days family event, there was joy and gladness, enjoyment and contentment as resources are immeasurably poured out by those who have the means, in acts of love and generosity. “Sometimes the greatest love is not found in the dramatic scenes that poets and writers immortalize. Often, the greatest manifestations of love are the simple acts of kindness and caring we extend to [our family]” (Joseph B. wirthlin). 

The men-cousins

The women-cousins

Grand children and great-grandchildren

There are still eight of us siblings who are blessed to have an extended life in mortality---Flordeliza, 80; Manolito, 73, Virginia, 70; Janedina, 68; Norberto, 65; Clemente, 63; Millan, Jr., 60; and Arnold, 58. Presiding over us in our family activities is our eldest living brother Manolito. We respect and support him as such. We are deeply grateful that his family leadership has always been a powerful uniting force around the family circle. 

I had been privileged to open our family reunion. My message was one of a reminder of the great love that our forebears have for us and a reassurance that our parents are happy in the other side of the veil for us turning our hearts to them by memorializing and honoring their legacy. I reminded the participants that the spirit of our parents are just around the corner. “They can see us, but we cannot see them unless our eyes were opened” (Brigham Young). I pointed to them of a sign of two birds flying fast into the reunion venue as if to show us that our father and mother were very happy to be in our midst. I bore witness with conviction of the eternal nature of families and that our family relationship is meant to be forever, that is why the adversary is working hard to direct its disintegrating assaults upon us. I encouraged the younger descendants to face their challenges and trials with courage and faith and hold on to their struggles to overcome and eventually attain victory. 

Cousins and spouses

Our eldest living brother Manolito, in his inspirational message, expressed gratitude for the outpouring of love and support to the cause of remembering the legacy of our parents. He thanked everybody for making our family reunion a tremendous success. He reminded us that because of each of our imperfections and personal weaknesses it is common and natural that we argue, we fight and at times even sever our communications with each other. He then delivered a clear patriarchal counsel that we need to lay to rest bitterness, hidden wedges and these common differences and never tolerate them to prevail as a deterrent in our continued efforts to be united as one big family, and instead work in harmony with each other and make sure that love will always be in our hearts. He admonished us to be more patient towards each other and let love be the bonds that will hold the family circle together when storms of life come. His inspired message was clear as to let us remember that our family tree has grown stronger and denser over the years as descendants continue to increase; that it has become like a handmade driftwood art which in time becomes even more precious. He conveyed to us a message of hope for joy and happiness to always be a part of our family relationships.

Women at the beach

The love and family camaraderie and the grand family fellowship we enjoyed together was given a fitting description by a quote: “A family reunion is a time to remember, a time to laugh, a time to celebrate, a time to share old stories and make new memories. A time to see each other in the faces all around us and find reflections of ourselves in hearts both young and old. A reunion is a coming together that strengthens the bond of family and reminds us of the gift of belonging. A chance to share our history. A reason to celebrate our past. A time to welcome our future as a family” (pinterest.com).

In behalf of us siblings, if there are ever words that would best convey the depths of our feelings of gratitude reserved in our hearts for the love and support; camaraderie and fellowship; physical help and most generous contributions; and attendance that each of our families have shared which made the Mil-Fran Gasta-Betita Family Reunion 2018 a success, I would be profoundly constrained to best express. However, there seems to be no better words than to say THANK YOU VERY, VERY MUCH! I am sure that the eyes of God see from the eternal heavens and He rejoices in our rejoicings for it has been part of His great eternal plan of happiness that families should work together to “…turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers…” (Malachi 4:6). Sure enough, what you have sowed “fell on good ground, and [will] sprang up, and bare fruit an hundredfold” (Luke 8:8). 

expressions of respect to the elderly

For those who may have been restrained to come for some valid reasons, we likewise express our heartfelt gratitude for your desires to be with us even in thoughts, with hopes and prayers that you will continue to be a participant in our continuing efforts to enliven the family tradition and legacy.

It is our hope and prayer that we will continue to have the desire to help strengthen the welding link that binds us together as a family. We pray in earnestness that we will continue to be united in love, harmony and peace throughout the coming years and even beyond this life for families are, indeed, forever. “Marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God. … The family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children” (“The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” Ensign, Nov. 1995, 102).

“The family is the most important unit in time and eternity and, as such, transcends every other interest in life” (Howard W. Hunter). It is the “link to our past, bridge to our future” (Alex Haley). We, therefore, most sincerely pray that we, together, will keep alive the family tradition towards greater family love, unity, harmony and peace!

THE WARMTH OF AN APOSTLE’S EMBRACE

By: Norberto Betita 

President Dallin H. Oaks, autographed photo

When Elder Dallin H. Oaks was called and sustained as an Apostle of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in General Conference of April 1984, he had his first visit as an Apostle in the Philippines sometime in 1986. During such time I was the Branch President of Surigao Branch under the Butuan Philippines District. In that visit he has in his itinerary a visit for an scheduled devotional at the Philippines Davao Mission, then presided by President Reynaldo Vergara, of which the Butuan Philippines District was part of the mission boundary.

I was privileged to have been invited by President Henry F. Acebedo, our District President to accompany him in going to Davao City by invitation from President Vergara. We were part of those who welcomed Elder Oaks at the Davao Airport, after which we proceeded to the Mission Homes located at the Insular Village. After some brief introduction he shook my hand and embraced me as though we were longtime friends. I was too small a Filipino to be encircled for the first time by a well-built oversize physical man in his early 50’s and a spiritual giant that for the first time in my life I felt the warmth of an Apostle’s embrace. Then we have some pictures taken with Elder Oaks, President and sister Vergara and President and sister Acebedo.

The following day we have to personally listen to the powerful modulated voice of a veteran radio announcer whom we knew to be by his admission during his devotional message at the Buhangin Philippines Stake Center. It was during that devotional that I heard him personally for the first time talked about callings in the church. He related that he was once a Regional Representative after which he was called to serve as adviser for the youth in the Aaronic Priesthood then as Gospel Doctrine Teacher. I am not so sure if I heard him right or have exactly remembered what he said, but I recalled that it was during his church service as Sunday School Gospel Doctrine class, and in his professional capacity as Justice of the Utah Supreme Court, that he was eventually called to serve as an Apostle. I remembered that it was from this diversity of callings, which he made as an example in his message that in the church, we are neither promoted nor demoted. “We just move around.”

This also became the subject of his October 2003 General Conference message, while he was on special assignment as Area President of the Philippines Area. He said: “A less serious worldly tradition that conflicts with gospel culture is the idea of upward or downward movement in positions. In the world, we refer to the up or down of promotions or reductions. But there is no up or down in Church positions. We just move around. A bishop released by proper authority and called to teach in Primary does not move down. He moves forward as he accepts his release with gratitude and fulfills the duties of a new calling—even one far less visible.” In the same message he related of an experience he had in the Philippines, thus:

“I saw a memorable example of this a few months ago in the Philippines. I visited a ward in the Pasig stake, near Manila. There I met Augusto Lim, whom I had known in earlier years as a stake president, a mission president, a General Authority, and president of the Manila temple. Now I saw him serving humbly and gratefully in his ward bishopric, second counselor to a man much younger and much less experienced. From temple president to second counselor in a ward bishopric is a beautiful example of the gospel culture in action.” (Dallin H. Oaks, Repentance and Change, October 2003 General Conference, lds.org).

During that devotional in Davao City, in his message about service and callings in the church, he also refreshed us of his first ever message as an Apostle delivered during the October 1984 General Conference, entitled “Why Do We Serve,” where he enumerated six reasons of service in the church which include, 1) service for hope of earthly reward; 2) service to obtain good companionship; 3) service out of fear of punishment; 4) service out of sense of duty or out of loyalty to friends, or family or traditions; 5) service motivated by hope for eternal reward; 6) “a more excellent way” service motivated by charity or the pure love of Christ. These were also part of a chapter in his book PURE IN HEART---Chapter 3---which I acquired later as a gift from a friend. I love what he wrote in the same chapter of the book which says, “Whenever we focus on ourselves, even in our service to others, we fall short of the example of our Savior, who gave himself as a total and unqualified sacrifice for all mankind. Those who seek to follow his example must lose themselves in their service to others.”

I treasured those lessons as a continuing motivation for me to serve. Since then I had served faithfully in different capacities in the church. I was called as a counselor in the Stake Presidency; twice as counselor in the District Presidency; three times as Branch President; a member of the high council, Elder’s quorum teacher; Sunday school teacher; Twice as counselor in the Mission Presidency and currently as auditor and District Sunday School President. I also encouraged my children to serve in the church as a matter of importance and priority.

For years the warmth of an Apostle’s embrace, which perhaps in my case can happen only once in a lifetime, had been an influence and a continuing impetus for me to serve in the church and Kingdom of God. What made that meeting even most memorable was the great love and thoughtfulness and respect that Elder Dallin H. Oaks as an Apostle of the Lord have shown to ordinary members in the provincial countryside like me. Weeks after that meeting, I received a mail at home with an autographed copy of an official photo of him as an Apostle with an inscription: “To Pres. Norberto Betita, with best wishes.” (Signed Elder Dallin H. Oaks). Never did I thought that he will remember me from out of the many people he met during that Philippine-trip. But he did, and that such expression of thoughtfulness and love from a living Apostle of the Lord, gave me such delight and elation.

That memorable encounter of 32 years ago with an Apostle of the Lord strikes a chord anew as I witness Elder Dallin H. Oaks move forward as the next senior apostle and being called as the first counselor in the First Presidency. O, how I love and sustain him, as much as I sustain President Henry B. Eyring and President Russel M. Nelson and the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles!

DISTRICT CONFERENCE: THE WORTH OF A CRUMPLED SOUL

By: Norberto Betita

Elder Tomas S. Merdegia---right 

I love conferences, whether it be a General Conference rebroadcast or a District Conference, as much as I love Sacrament Meetings. I always spare the whole of those conference and Sacrament Meeting hours as precious times. These to me are the best times, aside from daily scripture reading, to be refreshed of the principles of truth and righteousness that are in the Gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ and partake of spiritual renewal away from worldly influences.

The Surigao Philippines District Conference we have of last was a kind of spiritual feast. The presence of two Area Seventies, one presiding---Elder Tomas S.  Merdegia---and Elder Ryan Pagaduan who served as the interim Mission President of the Philippines Butuan Mission, provided the best spiritual menu for the conference. Not to mention the added spiritual recipes that were provided by other speakers who are among the local district leaders.

The trainings as conducted were different from the usual way of teaching in conferences, but it strengthens and edifies. The messages are truly in focus to the current concerns among the membership of the District.

During the scheduled Sunday General Session, as it is our habit, I and my wife came very early, excited of what God’s message would be from his servants. It was timely that Elder Merdegia was still giving his message and direction to the youth of the Surigao Philippines District. We tried to find a temporary seat at the back and listened while waiting for the youth session to conclude. My attention was caught by Elder Merdegia’s illustration of taking from his wallet a crisp P500 bill and crumpled it hard. Then he asked the youth whether the process of crumpling or deforming the bill had changed its worth. As the youth responded favorably, he explained more clearly and brilliantly that like each of us, no matter how crumpled our lives may be, the worth of soul remains precious in the sight of God. He then quoted from memory a favorite poem by Bradley Ray Wardle ---The Diamond in the Rough:

A diamond in the rough,
is a diamond sure enough:
And before it ever sparkles,
it is made of diamond stuff;

But someone has to find it,
or it never will be found:
And someone has to grind it,
or it never will be ground;

In the hands of the master,
it is cut and burnished bright:
Then that diamond's everlasting,
shinning out its purest light...

He explained that as it is, a rough diamond cannot be refined without somebody finding it and working to grind it towards becoming a sparkling precious gem. So it is with a crumpled soul, through the ever extended hand of the Master refiner it can shine bright its purest light into eternity. Danette Kettwich in another version of “Diamond in the Rough” copyright 2007, so beautifully expressed:

I was once a hopeless, lost diamond, concealed in the dark.
In a wretched and dismal cave where, no light could touch my heart.

The Lord reached in and found, this rough and filthy stone.
From out of the immense darkness, He claimed me as His own.

He set to labor immediately, His love always prevailed.
The reductions made with clarity, using a hammer and three nails.

The cuts were not without, struggle, growth and pain,
But with each came a brighter glow; a new lesson gained.

After the cutting was complete, His brilliance now could shine.
Luminous for all to see, a radiant diamond now refined.

I am far from being flawless; He's perfecting my luster still,
This diamond in the rough, being transformed within His will.

I occasionally become tarnished, I still can find the dirt and grime,
But He always finds and inspires me, once again to shine.

I know someday I will reflect, with His pure and flawless light,
In the radiance and presence of Jesus, the Illuminator of my life.

The assaults of the evil one are getting stronger and fiercer each and every passing day. Many are deceived and dragged into the devil’s enticing and alluring bait down the greased slide towards greater submission to sin and error and have their lives scrunched and squeezed to spiritual ruin. The physical and spiritual consequences are hard to bear. The agony of pain and sorrow for sin are just as real as wrestling against harrowing torment and falling into the dark abyss. Yet we are not lost in the Lord’s sight from the eternal heavens. He finds, invites and guides us back towards regaining our spiritual worth, no matter how defeated and confounded our souls may have been. President Henry B. Eyring quoted George Q. Cannon as saying: “There is not one of us that He has not desired to save, and that He has not devised means to save.” (Henry B. Eyring, “To My Grandchildren,” Ensign, November 2013, 71; quoting George Q. Cannon, Contributor, October 1890, 476).

Hence, however rutted our souls, Elder Boyd K. Packer assured us that, “Save for the exception of the very few who defect to perdition, there is no habit, no addiction, no rebellion, no transgression, [and] no crime [is] exempted from the promise of complete forgiveness. That is the promise of the atonement of Christ. . . . This knowledge should be as comforting to the innocent as it is to the guilty [such as] parents who suffer unbearably for the mistakes of their wayward children and are losing hope.” (Boyd K. Packer, “The Brilliant Morning of Forgiveness,” Ensign, November 1995).

During times of loneliness and despair, seemingly stripped of the influence of the Holy Ghost in consequence of sinfulness, we need not feel alone. Sister Janice Rosero, District Young Women President eloquently explained that our intimate relationship with the Lord is never lost. She quoted from the song by Michael McLean “You’re Not Alone”:

“You’re not alone, even though right now you’re on your own,
You are loved in ways that can’t be shown; your needs are known;
You’re not alone.
And when you cry, you’re just letting go of heartache deep inside,
And tomorrow there’ll be sunshine and sky and love close by;
You’re not alone.”

President Howard W. Hunter taught: "The scriptures … indicate that there will be seasons of time when the whole world will have some difficulty. We know that in our dispensation unrighteousness will, unfortunately, be quite evident, and it will bring its inevitable difficulties and pain and punishment. God will cut short that unrighteousness in his own due time, but our task is to live fully and faithfully and not worry ourselves sick about the woes of the world or when it will end. Our task is to have the gospel in our lives and to be a bright light, a city set on the hill, which reflects the beauty of the gospel of Jesus Christ and the joy and happiness that will always come to every people in every age who keep the commandments." (Howard W. Hunter, Teaching of the Presidents of the Church)

Indeed, in our walk in this telestial world, we are not left without a compass. The Lord has given us commandments to help keep us away from distortions and distractions that are very much common in the world today. President Pagaduan compared these commandments with the modern global positioning system (GPS). He explained that like the GPS if we only follow the commandments of God we will not be lost. He then related one experience when his GPS directed him to a different route. He tried to disobey the GPS confident that he knew better the way because he had been following the same very familiar route for years, only to find himself trapped in front of a bridge under repair. The GPS correctly points the detour as a way to safety, so are the commandments of God are always guiding us towards spiritual security.

However, many of us, steered by our pride and personal conviction that we know better according to the best experiences and brilliant ideologies in life, succumbed to temptations and disobey detour warnings. Soon we find ourselves spiritually wrecked and broken; become tainted and ruined in consequence of our disobedience. The once bright light that illuminates our lives turned dark and dreary to the end that our minds are blurred and brains worn out into a state of spiritual amnesia.

Yet it is promised that the Lord will come, “like a refiner’s fire, and like fuller’s soap; and he shall sit as a refiner and purifier of silver, and he shall purify the sons of Levi, and purge them as gold and silver, that they may offer unto the Lord an offering in righteousness” (D & C 128:24; see also 3 Nephi 24:2-3).

Thus, no matter the extent of damage brought upon the crumpled soul, there is always hope for the Lord’s refining process to turn its dismal and ugly past to its crisp condition and shine back in spiritual luster and great worth.

RELIVING THE FAMILY LEGACY

Janedina Gasta Betita-Depano Story

By Norberto Betita

Janedina Gasta Betita-Depano

When we were young we were always reminded by our parents to study and attain the highest education that we possibly can. Our maternal grandparents had also the same motivation for us. Education, they would say, is the only legacy that they can leave which could not be taken from us. There were thirteen of us children. Their daily living and means of livelihood are really not enough to support us in our quest for education and learning. Although most of us desired to attain at least college education others are reluctant because of our family’s economic condition.

It is of Filipino tradition that parents are to shoulder the education of their children through college and even post graduate if needs be. Therefore, with poverty always in front of our economic battle, the motivations and dreams of our parents for us to obtain the highest education possible are seemingly just a simple exercise of hope and faith and parental expectations for their children to rise above the level of penury where they had been constantly immersed.

However, with gut-wrenching determination and hard work dredged from their deepest desires for us children to be able to cross the chasm of our despondency, they pushed hard for our education to the best that they could most hardly afford to support. With such unbending parental support all of us went through and made it to high school education which during our time was already good enough. Some of us went through college still principally dependent from the support of our parents with assistance from our already employed siblings. College then was a very difficult pursuit with inadequate family finances. So that when opportunity for employment comes, we take no second thoughts and resign our educational dreams into the path of uncertainty.

The family now

Such was the case of my elder sister Janedina Gasta Betita. She was an intelligent student. While I was in high school and she was in college, I envied her grades. She studied hard knowing that the money invested in our education by our parents were hard-earned. But because of hard times, after her second year in college with a course leading to a degree in commerce, she decided instead to take the opportunity to work in the newly established Surigao Nickel Refinery, leaving behind her dreams for a college degree to the uncertain future.

While in such employment she met a humble man---Jaime Depano who would later became her marital partner. Jaime who was fondly called by his nickname Jimmy was a graduate of vocational course from Tarlac. He was the personal driver of the Administrative Manager while my sister Janie, as she is fondly called, was working as a clerk in the Personnel Section under the Administration Department. It was there that they met regularly and eventually became close, leading them to the sacred altar of matrimony. By their marriage their common dreams of obtaining a college degree were totally closed.

Remembering Jimmy now beyond the veil

As children came into the marriage and family in close succession, Janie eventually resigned from her job and focused on nurturing and rearing the children. She understood that, “The natural state of motherhood is unselfishness. When you become a mother, you are no longer the center of your universe. You relinquish that position to your children” (Jessica Lane). It was also timely that Jimmy’s vocational skills and communication and management capabilities were noted by the management and he was promoted into a Keyman---a supervisory position in the Plant Maintenance Department---and further promoted to the position of a Junior Staff. Jimmy’s junior executive position provided enough for the family’s needs and even the prospects of their children’s college education. Hence, included in their future family plans and goals were that of reliving the family legacy for their children’s obtaining the highest education they possibly could attain, which to them was bolted as a result of penury.

In my close association with Jimmy and Janie, I found them to be living in love, unity, harmony and peace as husband and wife. Such a legacy of family solidarity remains with their children even today. Their combined generosity and benevolence are still evident even with their children. They believed that the gift that makes the wallet frown, but rejoices and excites the heart is the most acceptable offering for loved ones and others.

Family of eldest daughter---Jeanette

Family life runs smoothly well until the children were already in their teens and the eldest already in college taking up a course in Nursing. During those moments of caring for her children with love and tenderness, Janie realized the truth expressed in the words of an unknown author: “The most precious jewels you’ll ever have around your neck are the arms of your children.”

While family resources may have been sufficiently provided, the weight of full time stay-at-home mother with nurturing responsibilities for four growing children, plus the consequent daily duty shift from mother to wife to attend to the tired and weary husband and provider, leaves for her no empty space for relaxation. Such heavy burdens attendant to her relentless struggles to train her four children in righteousness and guiding them daily in the right direction developed in her a steel in the spine. The prospect of a brighter future for the children remains bright until in the late 1980’s, when the Nickel Refinery closed. The unfortunate consequence of Union unrest was a tragedy to many of the employees of the company including Jimmy and Janie’s family.

The family have to temporarily transfer residence to the hometown of Jimmy in Tarlac while he was on interim assignment to report for office at the company’s Head Office in Manila. The transition was hard for the family. However, Jimmy and Janie never surrendered their commitment to support their children in their college education. They believed in the saying by Aristotle that “The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet.” Their eldest daughter have to be supported in her studies until she eventually finished her course and passed the Nursing Board Examinations. In the process of supporting the eldest, the second child---Jonathan had to temporarily stop schooling for one semester and tried to find employment.

Jimmy and Janie during their earlier married life

While in Manila Jimmy, knowing and realizing that there seemed to be only little hope remaining for the company to re-operate, tried to find opportunities abroad. His long years of executive plant maintenance experience in one of the largest Nickel Refinery in the world became instrumental in his bid for an executive position in a Japanese company based in Indonesia. He was employed and had to leave the family in the care of Janie. They rented an apartment in Quezon City for the children to be nearer the University of their choice and for their eldest daughter Jeanette to have easy access to her employment.

Reliving the family legacy was revitalized and college education for the children was again brightly programmed. Jimmy and Janie believed that “Education is not an expense, it’s an investment” (Nicholas A. Ferroni). Eventually Jonathan returned to college and graduated with a degree in Electronics and Communications Engineering. Jerwin, the third child, followed suit and graduated with a degree of Bachelor of Science in Business Management. The excitement and determination to finally achieve their family goals brought another joy as the fourth child--- Joyce---finally graduated with a degree in Nursing and became the second Registered Nurse in the family.

The sweet fruit of success in reliving the family legacy on the importance of education did come, not in the comforts of an elevator ride, but in a step by step climb amidst adversities, to the summit of attainment and victory.

Jimmy and Janie were ecstatic of the accomplishment of their dreams for their children. They were very confident that the rest of their goals and plans for the family would undoubtedly come to pass. 

Janie at the President Ronald Reagan Library, USA

However, the grand and glorious enjoyment and celebration of triumph was short-lived when a heartrending tragedy occurred in time when Jerwin was scheduled to leave for employment in Dubai. Jimmy died while on employment abroad. To the family the tragic event was too much of a trial to bear. Yet all the more that they become united in battling with such intense adversity---losing a husband, father and provider. Exercising their faith and devotion to God, they accepted it as the refiner’s fire in their lives. They  centered their faith in the Lord's promise: "And I will bring [them] through the fire, and will refine them as silver is refined, and will try them as gold is tried; they shall call on my name, and I will hear them: I will say, It is my people: and they shall say, The Lord is my God" (Zecariah 13:9).

Moving up to the goal which Jimmy and Janie had jointly drawn earlier in marriage, Janie stood firm and joined forces with her children to carry on. After all they have already savored the sweet fruit of success and fulfillment of their dreams for the children. In her and her children’s minds run the final lines of the poem by Clinton Howell---Don’t Quit.

“Success is failure turned inside out
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems afar;
So stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit,
It’s when things seem worst that you must not quit.”

With the insurance proceeds of Jimmy and the family helping together, they hold on to faith and wrestled life’s challenges with greater fervor and undaunted commitment and optimism.

The eldest---Jeanette---eventually joined the Filipino diaspora in the United States of America and worked as a Nurse, while the three others remained with their local employments. Together they combined resources and built a modest family home and bought a car of their own. And for Janie a grand vacation to the United States and some parts of Asia in reciprocation of those missed relaxing times and moments as a result of her affectionate dedicated submission to her spousal, motherhood and family duties.

Janie with her last born---Joyce at their home
in Quezon City

As Janie now sits on an elegant sofa in their beautiful living room, she must have remembered Jimmy with fondness and affection and certainly missed those times when love and tenderness had been the inspiration and gleaming light in their early marriage as they paint in panoramic view their future happy and successful family life. Jimmy may not have physically witnessed the dawn of final victory and the sunshine of ultimate fulfillment, yet all his sacrifices are never forgotten and are always made a part in the family’s book of remembrance and in the tablet of each other’s heart. Indeed, to Janie and the children, the drink that came with the bitter cup now tastes evermore sweeter and grander.

There is no greater joy and gladness for a mother than to receive sincere expressions of gratitude and love from her children in acknowledgement of her sacrifices as did this birthday greetings a year ago from her last born daughter---Joyce: “Maligayang kaarawan sa pinakamamahal kong mama! You taught me every meaning in life, you taught me the real meaning of strive. Thanks mom for being such a great inspiration. Hats off to your dedication. I am what I am today, only because you were there for me all these years. I wouldn't be half the person I am today if you had not showered me with your wise advice and love. I love you mama! Wishing you all the best today and always, 03/11/2017.”

At 68, Janie is now alone walking the lonely lane reserved for the aged, but happy, contented and joyful and enthusiastically fulfilled. She loves to help care and guide her grandchildren, if only to be sure that the family legacy bequeathed by our parents may move forward to the next and coming generations.

HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY IMMEDIATE ELDER SISTER JANIE! It is my wish and fervent prayer that God will bless you with continued health and vigor to enjoy the remaining lap of your life's race with contentment and abounding family love!

CELESTIAL MARRIAGE: THE WAIT IS OVER

by: Norberto Betita

Christopher and Therese May

Baptism into God’s Kingdom on earth and celestial marriage are two important Abrahamic covenants for our salvation and exaltation. The ordinance of baptism is a renewal of the Abrahamic covenant’s promise of salvation. When a man and a woman enter into the ordinance of celestial marriage they are actually performing a renewal of the Abrahamic covenant’s promise of exaltation, where the continuation of family relationship beyond this life and eternal increase was promised to Abraham and his posterity, of which the members became part by adoption after they were baptized into The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

Accordingly since time immemorial Apostles and Prophets of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Days Saints have counseled single men and women not to settle for less than Celestial Marriage. Yet some among the single women of marrying age sometimes struggle in their quest for potential celestial partners considering the fact that the role of courting seems to be only a special privilege for men. And most of those worthy returned missionaries are short in numbers than the worthy women in the church. This makes even harder for faithful single women of the church in the Philippines.

The Cebu Philippines Temple where they were married

One such was sister Therese May Angob. She did not have the opportunity to serve a mission, but she has long served faithfully in church auxiliary organizations, perhaps longest of which was in the Primary Organization where she is to care for little children, preparing and teaching them to become responsible members of the church. Her responsibilities towards the children as substitute mother while they were in church developed in her the greatest desire to be a mother herself. However, she wanted to stand by the counsel of leaders to marry the right man, at the right time, by the right authority, and at the right place which is the House of the Lord.

For some time she had been trying her best to be faithful in obedience to God’s commandments which is part of her covenant responsibilities as a possible heir of the promises given to Abraham and his posterity. As a woman she tried to be attractive to men her age. But fate appeared to be aloof. While the blessings of celestial marriage can still be available after this life or during the millennium as promised to the women who may not have the opportunity while in this life, yet the wonderful experiences of her family’s receiving the sealing ordinance and the joy and spiritual influence that it brings to their individual lives created in her an earnest desire to experience family life of her own while yet in mortality.

However, God has His own divine designs for His faithful children which are revealed in ways that are sometimes implausible. In 2010 Therese May commented on an lds.org post on Facebook about a convert from Africa who was very excited about his baptism. Then a Filipino returned missionary named Christopher also commented on the post. Surprisingly, the following day the same Christopher sent for her a friend request. Without even checking the profile of the man and other personal background information, she accepted and confirmed the friend request. She never even have the slightest impression that such a man would be a potential eternal partner, nor did she ever thought that their first chat will result to regular communications on Facebook. But from such a very unlikely encounter which to some might be just a glaring coincidence, was started the courtship and eventual long distance relationship which lasted seven long years.

In 2012 Christopher proposed for a temple marriage, however, because of her focus on the family’s difficult circumstances which are common among Filipinos, she decided to defer their marriage plans. Obstacles to their marriage goals did come and go. There was a time when again they were about to finally schedule the marriage with all members of her family already having the required temple recommends. But for some valid reasons marriage plans were again postponed.

Then her father died and she felt she lost her desire to be married. Her loving father, a former branch president of the church, was the one who planned for the reception and other things that are needed for the marriage. She was disheartened that he could no longer be present as she and Christopher exchange marital vows and be sealed for time and all eternity. However, because of the counsels of leaders, her prayers together with Christopher and the prayers of her loved ones and church friends, she became enlightened and comforted as to finally decide to proceed with their common dreams for a temple marriage. She realized then that her father will be very much happy about it, because it was also his dream for her to be able to enter the new and everlasting covenant of marriage in the House of the Lord.

Therese May is very much grateful to Christopher for persistently praying and most patiently waiting for their special day to come to pass. In her deep reflections and reminiscences of the event which brought them together from that most unlikely moment and venue for courtship where their eyes eventually meet and their words of love subsequently echo into their ears in tones of perfect and splendid harmony, she now recognizes God’s extended hands at work for her and Christopher. It was no coincidence, for as in the words of Elder Ronald A. Rasband, “Heavenly Father can put us in situations with specific intent in mind.”

Finally the dawn of their celestial marriage did come. On this day, the 21st of February 2018, in the beautiful sealing room and kneeling upon the holy altar of the Cebu Philippines Temple, Christopher and Therese May entered into the covenant of celestial marriage and vowed as husband and wife not only in this life, but throughout all eternity, in the presence of family and friends. At long last the wait is over.

The newlyweds will now start a new life as one flesh, bound together in love and devotion with a covenant and promise to be true to each other for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, for time and all eternity. Simultaneous with this covenant union is God’s promise: “…verily I say unto you, if a man marry a wife by my word, which is my law, and by the new and everlasting covenant, and it is sealed unto them by the Holy Spirit of promise, by him who is anointed, unto whom I have appointed this power and the keys of this priesthood; and it shall be said unto them---Ye shall come forth in the first resurrection; and if it be after the first resurrection, in the next resurrection; and shall inherit thrones, kingdoms, principalities, and powers, dominions, all heights and depths…to their exaltation and glory in all things, as hath been sealed upon their heads, which glory shall be a fullness and a continuation of the seeds forever and ever. Then shall they be gods, because they have no end...”(D&C 132:19-20).

The hurdles along their route to celestial marriage are now vanished and gone and indeed, the wait is over and "joy cometh in the morning" (Psalms 30:5). 

My warmest congratulations to Christopher Mariano and Therese May Angob on this their wedding day!

REUNION: TURNING THE HEART TO MY ANCESTORS

By: Norberto Betita

My parents: Millan Guhiting Betita & Francisca Mangle
Gasta Betita

In line with our scheduled Millian Guhiting Betita and Francisca Mangle Gasta Betita grand family reunion, I would like to share Chapter 5 of my written personal history, “Turning the Heart.” This is to enliven and pep up our family’s desire to know and remember our ancestors and search for the records of others of our forefathers who are not yet known. This is also aimed to allow some of our distant relatives on both sides to connect our ancestry and together join our search for those of our forebears who are already beyond the grave, that my family can help perform saving ordinances for them in the House of the Lord with their permission.

Family records in the Philippines are very hard to find, but now more are already available at familysearch.org for free research.       

Chapter 5

            “Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord:

            “And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse” (Malachi 4:5-6).

“…For their salvation is necessary and essential to our salvation, as Paul says concerning the fathers—that they without us cannot be made perfect—neither can we without our dead be made perfect” (D&C 128:15). As it is further written, “…It is sufficient to know, in this case, that the earth will be smitten with a curse unless there is a welding link of some kind or other between the fathers and the children…” (D&C 128:18).

                                                            The Lord declared from Mt. Sinai, “Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.” (Ex. 20:12.)

            Until I came to understand better the value of our eternal relationships with our forefathers did I begin to develop a yearning desire to leave for my children and posterity a record of my family as far as my personal knowledge and family history research can provide.

            The conditions of today seem to be in common with that of Noah’s era when the Lord speaks of smiting the earth with a curse, and the flood happened as to cleanse the earth. As it is declared by prophets after Noah this curse might be repeated if we fail to turn our hearts to our ancestors and our children. The Lord warned: “Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord:

            “And he shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse” (Malachi 4:5-6).

            In the light of the restored gospel and the restoration of the keys of the sealing power---the power which binds husbands and wives, and children to parents for time and eternity---by no less than the Prophet Elijah, I am, therefore, dutifully constrained to search out and turn my heart to my ancestors that they may be provided the opportunity to receive the saving ordinances of the gospel which they do not have the opportunity during their lifetime.   

MY ANCESTRY AND ORIGIN

            My paternal ancestral origin was traced from my Great-grandfather known only as Anco Arreza of Cantilan Surigao del Sur, estimated to have been born sometime in 1850. There is no known record of his marriage except that of his children: Jose – 1870; Dominga – 1872; Rafaela – 1874; Cornelio – 1876 and Juan – 1878. Records of their birth are all estimates. Their death records are also not available. For unknown reasons the family name was changed from Arreza to Betita.

            The family name Arreza is popular among Whites and Hispanics while Betita is popular among Asia Pacific Islanders. The family name Arreza in Cantilan, Surigao del Sur was said to be of Hispanic origin. As to how it got to our family line was unknown. It could be that it was through bloodline from intermarriages between Spanish conquistadors and locals or are just being adopted by the local populace.

            The origin of the family name Betita which was later adopted by our grandfather Jose was unknown. However, we believed that there may have been some family relatives who carried the same family name and was eventually embraced by my grandfather. 

            Jose Betita---my paternal grandfather---migrated to Anao-aon, Surigao del Norte together with his siblings and stayed in the place until their deaths. He married Nieves Guhiting -1888 and begat Bernardo – 1907, and Millan – 11 October 1909-November 10 1994. Millian was to be my father.  

            I do not have any memories of my great-grandparents and grandparents because they were all dead when I was born. My grandfather Jose must have been a farmer because he left for an inheritance for my father and uncle pieces of farmlands. I was told though that my grandfather was known in the community as a drunkard that he was nicknamed “Dalan” (road) because whenever he was drunk he slept wherever he wanted and usually on the road.

            My maternal ancestry can be traced back in Liloan, Leyte where my great-grandfather Catalino Luza Gasta – 1850 was born. He married Felomina Marqueda Gasta – 1853 and begat Porferio Marqueda Gasta – 1883. No other children were known.

            Porferio---my maternal grandfather---married Tecla Celino Mangle – 1886 and migrated to Anao-aon, Surigao del Norte. In such marriage were born Teotimo – 1908; Mercedes – 23 September 1910-15 December 2002 (later married to Ramon Japzon); Pancrasio – 2 May 1916-26 February 1976 (married to Elvira Gesta); Fermin – 1919; Francisca – 9 March 1921-24 January 2004 (my mother); Felicula – 1923 (married to Julian Lopez); and Policronia – 17 February 1926 still living as of this writing.

            From the families of Anco Arreza (Betita) and his unknown wife, then to Jose Betita and Nieves Guhiting Betita; and from Catalino Luza Gasta and Felomina Marqueda Gasta to Porferio Marqueda Gasta and Tecla Celino Mangle, spawned the Millan Guhiting Betita and Francisca Mangle Gasta Betita family and increasing posterity.

My young family

            Our maternal great-grandparents and grandparents were also of Spanish ancestry dating back to the colonization of European Ferdinand Magellan in Leyte and during the Spanish colonial period from 1521 to 1898. They might have been the product of Filipino and Spanish inter-marriages. 

            I am very close to my maternal grandfather. During my childhood and youthful days I used to be at their home helping fetch water or gather firewood for them. He was known among my siblings and cousins as being a very strict disciplinarian and really applied the rod to impose discipline even among his grandchildren. However, I always felt very comfortable with him and my grandmother when I am at their home.

            He related to me that he and his colleagues studied under the shades of mango trees. Their teacher used to have with him a whip on his table that whosoever got mistakes will get at least one lash.  He had an excellent command of the Spanish language. Even a college professor in Spanish language who lived in Anao-aon admired much his Spanish vocabulary.

            My grandfather during his younger days was an expert gambler---cards and cockfight. He used to show me how his cunning gambling tricks and deception earned for him much money. Yet he honestly told me that such dirty money never did build for him and his family even a comfortable small house. He admitted that it was his daughter Policronia who built the house for them. He always advised me not to be involved in such a dirty vice.

            A story was told of him being attacked by a fellow gambler at his back with the 2 x 2 lumber. Many thought that he was hit as he laid flat to the ground. But he briskly arose and hit is opponent with his brass arnis. He was an expert in the martial art of “Arnis de Mano or Eskrima.”

            He later turned to be a well-known quack-doctor and spiritual healer in our town and in the neighboring communities. I was told by my grandmother of an incident during my infancy when I was sick and at the brink of death. He went to the shore right at the bank of Anao-aon River and talked with the elements which were supposedly the carrier of disease and asked them to flee that I may be saved. And I survived.

            While Bible reading was strictly prohibited by the church, he used to read the Bible daily at their home. He had his Bible laid right at the center table of the living room where he daily sat to read it by the light from the glass window.

            On their backyard are several fruit trees which he planted of which his grandchildren enjoyed during fruit season. He loved animals. He raised chickens and pigs. He always had a dog and cats at home. He said he loved cats because they seemed to be the only pet who always prayed for his master to be rich, they always wanted to lie down on comfortable couches and soft cushioned beds.  

            In our town there was a popular hobby among teenagers and young adults where younger male chickens were utilized for kind of cockfights. My grandfather always offered for me what he believed was best for such petty gambling activity of youths from out of his own chickens. However, he did not fail to remind me of the consequences of such a vice. He even warned me to avoid and refrain as much as possible from drinking hard liquors that leads to drunkenness. That was the very reason that I grew up never being involved in such vices.

            My maternal grandmother Tecla Celino Mangle Gasta was very kind and humble and very loving old woman. Her vision never changed even in her ripened age. She still could hit a thread into a very tiny needle’s eye. She was such a small woman. She was loved by the grandchildren. She was very generous. She was very caring to her grandchildren. After each of my errands, she always offered me something to eat or drink. They always have enough reserves because my aunt Policronia always left for them a week’s supply of groceries, especially during her assignment as a teacher in a far municipality.

            With the help of my children and grandchildren, we have already performed most of the doable necessary saving ordinances for my ancestors for our families to be connected throughout all eternity.