DISTRICT CONFERENCE MOMENTS: A LEGACY OF LOVE, KINDNESS AND RESPECT

by: Norberto Betita

Elder and Sister Teh with my family

The tick of each second as it rounds the circle of a time piece seems to have increased its speed that the memories of the enjoyable past run close and fast as to easily connect to the pleasant encounters of the present. Indeed, time flies fast into the circle of life and as recollections open the portals of the mind and heart we are brought to remembrance our common race through life and thus recall in vivid reminiscences of those we once have been spiritually associated. Then as in the words of Elton John in his song The Circle of Life, we find that:

“Some of us fall by the wayside
And some of us soar to the stars
And some of us sail through our troubles
And some have to live with the scars.”

The year 1986 was such a time of historical excitement and stimulation in the Philippine Archipelago as it was the beginning of a transition government, a shift from what was then termed as a dictatorial regime. While political animation and vibrancy came to seemingly limitless heights, the works of spreading the words of God remained a constant and normal activity among the ambassadors of the Lord Jesus Christ in many parts of the country.

During such a time, I was the Branch President of a small branch of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in Surigao City. That was 33 years ago and now the branch has already grown into a district with 6 branches. Communication was very inadequate then and mail deliveries were generally sluggish. Seldom do we have any information of a new missionary coming into our place to serve until they were already at our doors. 

Elder Teh as a young missionary in Surigao City with my young family

However, such was not the case on Elder Michael John U. Teh. During one of our meetings with the District Presidency, we were told that we have a new missionary coming, in the name of Elder Teh. President Henry F. Acebedo, a physician, who was then our District President jokingly told us that he is from Singapore as his Chinese family name suggests. President Acebedo’s clinical secretary who is a member, was also informed about the new missionary as coming from Singapore. So that when Elder Teh and his companion arrived at the clinic, she communicated with him in the English Language, until all the words and phrases she had shortly reserved for the engagement was consumed. That’s when Elder Teh ended the prank and answered her in perfect Visayan of which the missionary was very fluent being a native of Davao City. 

With my 3 original children as they are now

While most missionaries have common virtues of love and kindness and respect, Elder Teh has a very special touch that easily connects him to the members. He’s been so keen of each members’ tickle, both old and young, and even to other missionaries, as to easily get their attention and respect and friendship. He was then the kind of a young man whose influence created an increased capacity for cooperation in the Lord’s work. No wonder then that he has been a successful influencer of members’ desire to become active participants in the Lord’s missionary work.

When we were in Manila for our temple sealing as a family, he must have known that we were destitute of funds. He probably wrote his mother in advance, before we even leave, that we are going to the temple and he asked for some amount of money purportedly for the Christmas season, to be sent through us. He instructed his mother not to close the envelope, so that should we be short of funds, we will be able to use the money. We have never utilized it anyway, but we appreciated very much his concern about our possible dilemma while in a place far away from home.

When he was transferred to another area, he sent us a picture as a reminder of him, expressing his love for our family. We don’t have any contact, personal or otherwise, for several years. In fact, as far as I could remember we only met once at the Church Administration Office when he was yet working as Manager of the Member’s Statistical Records Division which was then my direct contact as Branch President for statistical reports. We have not met since then, until he was called as a General Authority Seventy and was assigned to preside over our district conference for the first time. He surprised us with a visit at our home with a gift of a Cassette Tape version of Stephen R. Covey’s work---The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. By his touch of thoughtfulness, during his most recent visit, he again gifted us with a Manila Philippines Temple puzzle, perhaps to remind us of the prophet’s counsel to attend the temple regularly. 

My growing family with already five children

 Although my two other daughters were not yet born when he was serving in Surigao, they know him, because we always talked about him in the family. We apprised them of how he loved and respected us and how we appreciated and cherished his kindness. The children’s love and respect of him even magnified when he was called as a General Authority Seventy.

Once, while I and sister Betita were in the Cebu Philippines Temple, we accidentally met him together with the area presidency at the garment’s counter, and he was just so excited to embrace us and introduced us to the Area President and the other counselor. We were elated and thrilled for such kind of affection and fondness he extended to us. 

Sneaked shot of Elder and Sister Teh at the NAIA by my daughter

Most recently, my youngest daughter, observed him and Sister Teh at the Manila International airport waiting for their flight to Bacolod. She immediately and excitedly sent us a sneaked picture of him and Sister Teh. That’s how he is loved in the family and how such connection influenced even those of our children and grandchildren who were not yet born when he was here for his mission.

When we were told that he will be coming again for the second time to preside over our Surigao District Conference, Sister Betita suggested for us to invite him and Sister Teh for a dinner. I asked her if she had enough money. She jokingly said, we will ask him to pay the cost. Then three days before his arrival, our son Robert, who is our District President, received a message that Elder and Sister Teh wanted to have a dinner with the whole family. Of course, Sister Betita was ecstatic that her kind of silly imagination was, by some providence, relayed through the airwaves and transmitted into the mind of Elder Teh. Indeed, the whole family was very happy and excited to meet the two of them and have a dinner with them. 

Elder Michael John U. Teh with me

Such was an enjoyable sumptuous dinner. Elder and Sister Teh appreciated our acknowledging their invitation as much as we were very much grateful for having such the honor to be their dinner guests---sixteen of us in the family. However what was most memorable was Elder Teh’s sincere appreciation of our increasingly active participation as members of the Church. We value so much his reminder to the whole family that it doesn’t matter if we don’t have much of the worldly mammon for as long as we are continually working for our wondrous inheritance in the celestial kingdom of God. It brought to memory the context of his General Conference message: “There is no end to what the world has to offer, so it is critical that we learn to recognize when we have enough. If we are not careful, we will begin to chase after the temporal more than the spiritual. Our pursuit for the spiritual and eternal will then take a backseat, instead of the other way around. Sadly, there appears to be a strong inclination to acquire more and more and to own the latest and the most sophisticated.” With which he quoted the prophet Jacob in 2 Nephi 9:51, “Wherefore, do not spend money for that which is of no worth, nor your labor for that which cannot satisfy. Hearken diligently unto me, and remember the words which I have spoken; and come unto the Holy One of Israel, and feast upon that which perisheth not, neither can be corrupted, and let your soul delight in fatness.” (Where Your Treasure Is, April 2014 General Conference, lds.org.) 

Elder and Sister Teh ministering with the Lerio family

With his recent visit, Elder Teh and sister Teh, again left for us and the rest of the members of the Surigao Philippines District, a legacy of love, kindness and respect which surely will last a lifetime. They visited a new member family of brother and sister Lerio who were struggling. They had been preparing for their temple blessings when a crucially distressing and heartrending trial came upon them which eventually resulted in the loss of their beloved granddaughter. They were persecuted by some relatives and friends, believing that the loss of a child was a curse for their leaving the religion of their birth. But they hold on to faith that it was God’s providence that the child be taken for a better and more important purpose. Accordingly, Elder Teh gave the father, who is not a member of the church, a Priesthood blessing of comfort and love.

They also visited a long time member, brother and sister Ariar, who are now old and feeble, and also gave sister Ariar, who is sick, a Priesthood blessing. Knowing that one member, whom he baptized when she was only 13 years old, is still in Surigao City, he was moved with enthusiasm to meet with her. His efforts was never in vain for a few minutes before they left for the airport, Rachel---already a mother of two---came to meet him at the hotel. It was a short but one memorable reunion. 

With one of the members he baptized---Sister Rachel (2nd from left)

Their conference messages resonate angelic zeal as to merit reverential veneration. Emotional expressions may have brought for them and for us tears, but such were tears of joy and gladness and meaningful display and confirmation that by their counsels and instruction we had been edified and spiritually strengthened.

The reiteration and emphasis of the prophetic declaration by President Russel M. Nelson about the reduced Sunday services hours was instructive. The prophet said: “The new home-centered, Church-supported integrated curriculum has the potential to unleash the power of families, as each family follows through conscientiously and carefully to transform their home into a sanctuary of faith. I promise that as you diligently work to remodel your home into a center of gospel learning, over time your Sabbath days will truly be a delight. Your children will be excited to learn and to live the Savior’s teachings, and the influence of the adversary in your life and in your home will decrease. Changes in your family will be dramatic and sustaining.” (Becoming Exemplary Latter-Day Saints, General Conference, October 2018, lds.org.)

The reminder to be on guard because the “the assaults of the adversary are increasing exponentially, in intensity and in variety (Ibid.)” is expressive of sincere concern for the spiritual wellbeing of individual members and their families. 

With members after conference

Simultaneous with those wonderful training instruction and counsels there was that wonderful and humble demonstration of camaraderie which for us leaves a legacy of love, kindness and respect.

Chances are that we might not be able to meet again. With more than a hundred stakes and several more districts in the Philippines to visit it would be impossible for them to be able to have a return visit before Elder Teh will be reassigned to another area and country. But I’m sure that they will be remembered and their goodness will ever linger not only in my own family but to others as well.

With district leaders after conference

I am 13 years Elder Teh’s senior and my life in mortality may not be long enough. But I will eternally cherish and treasure his love and kindness and respect which virtues were also noted by an old American woman who once served in the Manila Philippines Temple, a friend to President Thomas S. Monson. When after his mission she met President Monson, she told him of a very loving, kind and considerate young man who works as Temple recorder. When Elder Michael John U. Teh, years later, was sustained as a General Authority Seventy of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints on March 31, 2007, that’s when she wrote about her impressions of the man as being divinely confirmed.

The time piece of mortality continues to calculate the hours and the calendar of life takes its role to renew and count each and every passing day and provide sequence of each coming year. Indeed, there will be more dawns and sunsets; there will be more Christmases and New Years as the earth continues its orbit. For Elder Teh, as a servant of God, there may still be more work to do and more people to influence. His love and kindness and respect for people he had been called to serve as a General Authority Seventy will yet find more space in the hearts of many of the sons and daughters of God.

ANGELS USHERED HIM INTO THE GRAND REUNION

By: Norberto Betita 

Bonifacio Miole Subang

Today the veil to the other side of eternity parts as the spirit of one pure in heart, while sleeping beneath the consuming pains of a lingering illness, was quietly ushered by angels into the open doors of death to a grand reunion with his loved ones and friends in the world of waiting spirits, while his physical body was left cold and dead at his home.

Brother BONIFACIO MIOLE SUBANG died at about 8:00AM, January 31, 2019, peacefully at a ripened age of 82. He is now rested from all the intensifying stings and anguish of mortality and is now "received into a state of happiness...a state of rest, a state of peace, where [he] shall rest from all [his] troubles and from all care, and sorrow." (Alma 40:12.) He is survived by his beloved wife Isabelita and sons Renato and Reynado and grandchildren.

We will be missing him. He's been an example of righteousness and virtue. A faithful husband and father. A good neighbor. A diligent Priesthood leader, serving as branch president twice and in several other different voluntary callings from God. Tears streamed as I reminisced in quiet reverie the goodness of the man whose enduring faith had invariably shunned the loss rocks of life which the adversary dumped along his way while he tried to climb the mountains to find the solid stones of spiritual safety---the truths and the atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ.

He lived a pattern of life that eschew the common rubbish that the world enjoys. He tried not to listen to the soft, enticing, and pleasant voice of the adversary that tempt him to pollute his mind with lies. Notwithstanding the sinful nature of man, he tried to spurn evil, anger, hatred, bitterness and offensive behavior that demeans the spirit in him, yet he was not perfect.

While submerged in a suffocating and diminishing physical condition, down the abyss of an excruciating battle with a haunting serious infirmity, he submitted everything to the care of the Lord Jesus Christ and leave all his sufferings to Him. He tried to cover up all his discomforts with the tender smile from his humors and even ostensibly acted as though he was not in a critical health condition. He trusted the Lord Jesus Christ to attend to him and just leave his anguish and final destiny to His will. The soreness may have lingered, but the fear of slipping into the other side of the veil was no longer in his stressed soul.

I was spiritually impressed by the way the Lord has called him to the other side of the veil. While his unchained soul was soundly asleep, his spirit, in purity, willingly and silently abided the last summon that the angels served for him to finally part the veil. Such was a wonderful and glorious transition from mortality to the spirit world and into the marvels of immortality. 

 

With wife - Isabelita Subang

             
Surely it will be very painful to his dearly beloved wife---Sister Isabelita Subang. They had been very close to each other while walking the plains of mortality. Their love for each other was sealed in the House of the Lord for time and all eternity. They had been such an exemplary couple. Even in their difficult circumstances they had been so generous of their little resources to others. They both served in the church together. The emptiness of having lost a dearly beloved and lifelong partner by her side is such a depressing ran off. But life has to move on and Sister Subang will yet have to wait for the time when the Lord will call her to follow her beloved partner into eternity. President Russel M. Nelson said: “We can’t fully appreciated joyful reunions later without tearful separations now. The only way to take sorrow out of death is to take love out of life.”

His paragon of fatherhood and paternal examples of the virtues of patience and perseverance; of long suffering; of gentleness and meekness; and of love unfeigned, will assuredly remain a beacon for his sons to emulate and remember as they move farther into the private realization and recognition of their failings, and the reconciliation of their individual life back into the covenant path.

President Dallin H. Oaks said: “Death is not the conclusion of our identity but merely a necessary step in our Heavenly Father’s merciful plan for the salvation of His children.” Therefore, brother Subang will be remembered as he is and all the realities of his life in mortality will remain to be a living memory for those who loved him. At this time, all that he wanted would be for us to accept his present reality. 

In his long wrestle with his lingering affliction, brother Subang was in fact taking the stretch of the shadow of death, best prepared to stand before the judgment bar of the righteous judge of all, even the Lord Jesus Christ. President Russel M. Nelson said: "Death is only premature for those not prepared to meet God." 

Even in his weaknesses and imperfections, he lived his life ready in ways that is most acceptable as to warrant the promises which the Lord himself has declared: “For verily I say unto you, blessed is he that keepeth my commandments, whether in life or in death; and he that is faithful in tribulation, the reward of the same is greater in the kingdom of heaven.

“Ye cannot behold with your natural eyes, for the present time, the design of your God concerning those things which shall come hereafter, and the glory which shall follow after much tribulation.

“For after much tribulation come the blessings. Wherefore the day cometh that ye shall be crowned with much glory…” (D & C 58:2-4.)

Indeed, as President Thomas S. Monson had said: "Death is not the end. It is putting out the candle because the dawn has come." Perhaps, before brother Subang finally held the guiding hands of angels and put out the candle to be welcomed to the new dawn of his eternal journey, he must have tried first to take a final look and left his bidding of inaudible sad goodbyes to his dearly beloved Isabelita and his sons---Renato and Reynaldo---and his dear daughter-in-law---Emily---and beloved grandchildren, in grateful acknowledgement of the joy and gladness they have provided and shared together in family life while yet in mortality.

His physical body will soon be delivered back to the dust from where it came, while angels ushered him into the grand reunion in the spirit world, a state between death and resurrection. There he will continue his eternal journey and progressive work of perfection to attain the final point of his eternal destination into the indescribably magnificent and glorious realms of the celestial kingdom of God.

A message of sympathy for the bereaved family from a friend across continents and oceans was sent, "A loving bond lives on forever, in memories of all that was shared together. May the beautiful and loving memories of all precious moments that were shared, and the happy times that were known, bring comfort to you and help ease your sorrow at this difficult time.”

We express our deepest sympathies and heartfelt condolences to the bereaved family of our dear BONIFACIO MIOLE SUBANG. May we all be comforted by the thought as has been expressed by President Gordon B. Hinckley that, “The pain of death is swallowed up in the peace of eternal life.”

BEYOND THE PAINS OF POVERTY

by: Norberto Betita

Virginia Gasta Betita-Bañacia

We were born and raised in a small fishing and farming town where opportunities for economic advancement was almost nil. Personal growth and development were somewhat beyond attainment. Poverty was such a common lot among many and most in the community were living from hand to mouth; somehow stranded in the marsh of destitution. Only a handful of landed families were living in quite affluence. Most couples during those early days married young and therefore are most likely to have more children. So were our parents. My mother married when she was 14 years old, and thus begat 14 children in 13 conceptions, with one still-born.

Such a sad reality even magnified the level of our family struggles and difficulties. We were like lonely travelers wedged in a shipwreck. However, with the undeterred optimism and determination of our parents, we harbor hope as a motivating force to abandon ship and disembark from the wreckage and find our way ashore. Our parents provided education as a bridge to get us out of the mess of life. Notwithstanding such a difficult and expensive approach to rise beyond the pains of poverty, they always encouraged us to hold on to education as the only sure channel to the blissful shore. 

Boy and Gin

My sister Virginia “Gin” Gasta Betita was seventh in succession of us siblings but she was the second to have endured the rigors of intensifying struggles in the midst of the family’s tremendous financial scarcity. The rest of our elder brothers and sisters, stepped aside from the difficult route of their educational pursuits either out of pity for our parents or having lost hope to attain their goals, and thus took short cut careers. 

Gin eventually graduated with a degree of Bachelor of Science in Secondary Education, major in English from the Northeastern Mindanao Colleges (NEMCO). Her passing the teacher’s board examinations eventually provided her with a secure career. For a moment she helped in the family finances. However, she was soon attracted to the youngest son---Jose “Boy” Bañacia, Jr.---of our parent’s longtime family friend. Not long after, they sealed their courtship on the sacred altar of matrimony, thus the name Bañacia was added to her maiden name. 

The whole family

In time, with a secure career at the Surigao del Norte National High School, they were able to start their married life in modest living. They rented and for a time lived in a low cost apartment near the school where she worked. Then their eldest child was born, a daughter; and in just a year there came a son; and again in another one sweeping year they got another daughter. That had been a three grueling years of their married life with three little babies to care for---ages three, two and one. Of course, Gin and Boy were young then and perhaps have genetically inherited the productive DNA’s of their parents, both of which were blessed with abundant posterity.

They should have learned a lesson the hard way for caring three little babies while both working and thus applied some restraint and discipline. However, the protein synthesis responsible for the transmission of hereditary characteristics from their parents, must have been so strong as to slap away self-control and mental restrictions. Therefore, in a lapse of only two years their fourth child---a daughter---was born. They probably thought that such must have been the last, that they were able to manage to hold back and redirect their attention to caring for their now four little children, not only because it is draining the family finances, but it is such a great sacrifice and energy exhausting for Gin, a working mother, to nourish and nurture. But the self-replicating nature of their productive DNA, remained to be of great influence and command that after four years of restraint, they realized that they already have five children of their own to raise and rear and educate. They soon recognized that with their income at the same level, they will inevitably be pushed hard against the wall of poverty. They therefore reached a consensus to finally end childbearing. 

Boy and Gin with children

While the children were still in elementary and high school, they were able to manage to support their financial needs with the coconut farm income of her husband and other agricultural earnings he brought into the family coffers. Her husband also earned additional income as tricycle driver. Soon they were able to secure a right of a property in the squatter’s area, accessible to the children’s schools and her workplace. There they built a larger nipa house for their growing family to be accommodated. However, inflation finally took its tool and thus made it hard for them to make both ends meet.

Nevertheless, the incumbent threat for greater economic strains never deter her from sending her children through college. When her eldest daughter---Mirinisa---graduated from high school, she sent her to an expensive Catholic school in the locality---San Nicolas College. It was not long before she realized that her son---Dennis---was also going to college at the Central Mindanao University (CMU). In a year the third child---Charissa was also at CMU. And before her eldest, Mirinisa was able to finish her degree in education, there were already four of them in college, with the fourth child---Florisa also schooled at CMU. While as college scholars, tuition and fees were affordable for her three children in a government university, yet living allowances for the three away from home was kind of insurmountable. In her mind must have been the inspiring words of Gilda Radner: “[Motherhood is] the biggest gamble in the world. It is the glorious life force. It’s huge and scary—it’s an act of infinite optimism.” 

With living siblings

With the family being trapped under the pains of hard times, some might have thought it as an stubbornly unreasonable attempt or perversity of purpose, to send all four children through college in succession of time. Perhaps reason and logic would suggest that they first should have to let one or two to postpone college until others are graduated. But for Gin and Boy it was a remarkably courageous and faith-filled bid and communal family undertaking to cut across and circumvent all poverty related walls and stumbling blocks toward success, not for them, but for their children, no matter the cost. Gin knew, as it was her experience that education is the only link that can bridge the gap between poverty and attainment. She knew by her own strenuous and fearless battle against mounting adversities while trying herself to cross the chasm of penury that beyond the pains of poverty and yonder the deepest depths of struggle, there is set a marker atop the hill and in the far open plateau, a flag of victory for each enduring traveler. Hence, she and Boy were willing to invest all available resources for such a positively beneficial and worthwhile initiative.

Gin was fortunate to have such intellectually gifted and good natured children as to understand their parent’s predicaments. They burned their midnight candles to make sure their parents will not be frustrated. They hang on to their individual goals in times when exams became difficult and school requirements are hard to accomplish. They tighten their belts when pressures of budgetary constraints stepped up. Accordingly, the eldest---Mirinisa---graduated with a degree of Bachelor of Science in Education and became a professional teacher. The second son---Dennis---graduated with a degree of Bachelor of Science in Forestry and passed the board examinations. The third---Charissa also graduated with a degree in Environmental Science and passed the professional Civil Service examinations. The fourth, however, after three years in college, slipped away from the path and decided to take marriage as a priority. 

Enjoying together at retirement

The fifth and youngest---Neresa---also graduated with a degree of Bachelor of Science in Information Technology, Cum Laude. That should have been their last. But while her children were yet in college, she decided to foster a first degree grandson---Gil Franz---whom they treated as their own, while yet a little boy, and also sent him through college and eventually completed a Bachelor of Science in Business Administration degree, major in Financial Management, then while working took a teacher's certificate course and eventually passed the Licensure Examination for Teachers.

During those periods of incomprehensible difficulties to meet the increasing demands of their college students, personal high cost debts mounted; inherited coconut farm and rice land were sold; their cows were likewise marketed. All those were invested and are now made part of the bridge which their children and foster son now gloriously utilized to traverse on to their journey to a far better and more prospective future. The old nipa house which has since became a banner of hope for the family to rise above the pains of poverty, is all that was left for Gin and Boy, after their dream for a possible modest house erected on an inherited lot, to be financed by a Pag-ibig Fund loan was eventually erased from the plans in favor of their children’s future well-being.

Yet, during all those tough times in her life, Gin had always been a noble teacher to her students, a faithful and loyal wife, a darling daughter to our parents, a loving sister. As an angel mother, her children might have thought as did Maya Angelou who wrote, “To describe [our] mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colors of a rainbow.” (Maya Angelou.) Such is one fitting description of a mother who is able to nurture and raise her children in strict discipline and kindly love as to build for them strong characters which are now humbly exhibited by the respect and love they have for their parents, and the unity, harmony and peace that they shared together in the family circle. Indeed, after the hurricane’s ferocity, a rainbow of beautiful colors is formed in the grandiose sky, between the showers of raindrops and creeping sunshine. 

Enjoying as a united family together

Now gone are the daily thoughts of uncertainties and anxieties of meeting the demands of motherhood and parental responsibilities. While one may have temporarily slipped from the bridge she provided, yet she is happy that her daughter had decided to choose a more imperative duty of a woman. Nonetheless, she is hopeful that in due time, her fourth child---Florisa---will walk back into the bridge and reinvent her educational goals while the children are still young.

At 71, having been born on January 28, 1948, Gin is now relishing the joy and contentment of her life’s humble accomplishments for her children. In quiet reverie, she savors looking at the brilliant light that the future holds for them while enjoying in satisfaction and serenity the fond memories of their past overwhelming struggles. Gone are her dreams of a comfortable life for herself, but delights looking far into the open horizon and reminiscing God’s infinite blessings of faith and hope; and strength and courage to withstand the grueling tests of family life. Gin and Boy now live content with her modest monthly pension delightfully welcoming visits and tender embraces of love from their ten grandchildren in the same old nipa house, with nipa roofing now replaced with galvanized corrugated sheets with the same structure, which for so long had stood against the wiles of adversity and remains strong a beacon of dignity, integrity and hope beyond the pains of poverty. 

To my dear elder sister Gin, happy, happy, happy 71st birthday! May the glorious light of day adds grandeur to the wonderful memories of the past and sends its rays to a vision of a verdant landscape at the end of the tunnel for you and your family.

MILESTONE: OUR 45 YEARS OF ENDURING MARITAL FIDELITY AND LOVE

by: Norberto Betita

It all started with a tearful class discussion and argumentation in a college subject, followed by heartfelt and sincere apologies from the offender, eventually turning anger into a tender and kindhearted forgiveness onwards to a flourishing friendship. Then a bud of love blossoms deep in the garden of the heart, yet shadowed and stalked by rejection, skepticism, and prejudice from kith and kin, tolerated by shabby and slovenly outward display of personal or physical characterization.

However, the imperfections and weaknesses that was flaunted and floated aboard an unappealing countenance found an enveloping overlay as the depths of an inner strength and endowment were to the honest seeker unlocked. So that all that was down-at-the-heels were obscured by the image of potentials within the intimate specifics inherent in the man. 

After three years of nurturing such an affectionate friendship and love; provoked by prior intimidating circumstance, and even if under pressure of being financially off guard, we decided to tie the knot together in a very simple wedding ceremony on January 23, 1974, which I am always proud to declared with honesty, only cost for us P50.00 worth of a reception. It was attended only by two witnesses and the solemnizing authority---the Mayor of our town---as guests and my parents and some of my younger brothers. 

Looking back from this marvelous milestone of our 45 years of enduring marital fidelity and love, I am continually awed at such a wonderful journey together notwithstanding all the odds and the great sacrifices we have to continually endure until this mortal expedition eventually ends. I have written much about our spousal journey, and the chronicles of our struggles through thick and thin proved once and for all that marriage can truly and surely flourish even in the midst of the darkest nights of life’s voyage. It can survive despite endlessly demanding economic scarcity and physical limitations; and it can be protected safe and away from the blandishing temptations to go against moral imperatives, especially as regards our sacred wedding vows. It is only a matter of holding on together to our temple covenants while crossing the wild frontiers and the tempestuous oceans of life that the battle against tremendous adversities in marriage and family life is won.

We both cherish those long and resplendent years of living together with unswerving loyalty and commitment to our everlasting covenants of marriage and parental accountability, notwithstanding the advent of moral relativism. We tried to keep and value our integrity and trust as a common responsibility for each other and have it bolted in our mindset and belief, as though there is nothing better. We felt that like many other couples, we don’t have the luxury of time each day, each month, each year, but we strive to seek for some precious moments to nourish our love and affection setting aside differences and other negative influences, and working together for our common good. We kneel together in prayer to God each new day that He has blessed us to live, for guidance and inspiration, and daily express our affectionate devotion with each other in tenderness of feelings. 

We do not claim perfection in our marriage, but we tried passionately and relentlessly to stand by the sealing covenants and promises we entered into in the House of the Lord, to regularly invite the power from heaven consequent of such eternal bonds, as it is predicated by our obedience, to help us continue to walk the covenant path and overcome obstacles along the way. President Dieter F. Uchtdorf once said, “True love requires action. We can speak of love all day long, we can write notes or poems that proclaim it, sing songs that praise it and preach sermons that encourage it but until we manifest that love in action, our words are nothing but sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.” (You Are My Hands, General Conference, April 2010, lds.org.)

The majesty of it all is aligned with the fact that, came rain or shine all along the stretch of that long marital journey---where restraint is always at work, where love and humility always abound, and where understanding each other’s frailties is a thriving element---we are finally alighted into this profoundly awe-inspiring accomplishment of attaining our grand Sapphire wedding anniversary, a very significant magnification in the lens of our conjugal history. As in precedent celebrations, we may not have the common grandiose preparations, yet we always have the best menu laid on the 45-year almost antiquated matrimonial table---our unbounded love and timeless devotion to each other resembling nothing else.

The wonderful bouquet of a thousand roses fades in a day or two. The precious Sapphire which symbolizes our 45 years of marriage will be replaced in a year. A grandiose Wedding Anniversary treat will only last a mealtime. The only enduring best gift that I could give to my ever dearest Letty---the best thing that ever happened to me; the beauty and loveliness that add wonders down the rolling hills of my lonely trail; the woman who provides cheers upon my weary soul; the light that gleams in my darkest hours; the healer of my lingering pains; the indomitable support in my heap of troubles; and the cross bearer that helped me carry the weight of my daily yoke---is not new but is ever fresh. It is my most sincere expressions of love that has since been each and every day and has never changed and never will. Thus, from the deepest chamber of my heart and through the doorway of my bosom deep where my everburning feelings lay, I say to my ever dearest Letty, I LOVE YOU, TILL ETERNITY RUNS OUT OF TIME. These are no exaggeration, but a literary figurative conversion of my deepest feelings and candid manifestations of love and gratitude which are beyond words to verbally convey, therefore, translated into words of poetic lines. 

The lengthy years of our married life, may not have been ornamented with worldly mammon, yet we had been blessed each day with provisions adequate for our needs. We felt “content with the things which the Lord hath allotted unto [us].” (Alma 9:3.) We are grateful to have known and understood early in our membership in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints that the powers in heaven are not about anything and everything in this world, but are divinely enshrined in family life. Such that in all the preparations of the Lord’s Second Coming, He is pushing all efforts to strengthen the families and help them build walls of protection against the assaults of the adversary through the gospel and revealed truths.

Elder James E. Talmage once wrote, “When the frailties and imperfection of mortality are left behind, in the glorified state of the blessed hereafter, husband and wife will administer in their respective stations, seeing and understanding alike, and cooperating to the full in the government of their family kingdom…Then shall woman reign by Divine right, a queen in the resplendent realm of her glorified state, even as exalted man shall stand, priest and king unto the Most High God.” (James E. Talmage, “The Eternity of Sex,” Young Woman’s Journal, October 1914, p. 600-603, quoted by Jeffrey R. Holland, To My Friends, p. 238.) 

The beauty of timeless origin

When we were friends

When we were newly married attending her sister's graduation

Our sealing at the Manila Philippines Temple-1986

About 1990

Late 1990's

Early 2000

Our longevity is now past the threshold where many among our associates and contemporaries had already crossed the portals into the realms of immortality. We have already enjoyed with contentment the blessings we have deeply desired. Although we wanted to persist in moving forward with faith we are uncertain as to how long we will be made to wait for that blessed day of slipping into the other side of the veil. We are not sure of the Lord’s timing, and although we seemed to be moving on to our destined route, yet we are not certain which exit we should follow. But definitely, we do not want to be stranded in this troubled world. 

Therefore, as I wanted to leave an enduring legacy for my children and posterity, I would rather have the chronicles of our enduring story---of marital and family love, unity, harmony and peace; together with those unending battles of overcoming challenges and adversities of such a long and winding journey---concluded and printed while I am still in my mortal capacity. At least by so doing, I still can bear them witness of the verities of what I did say and write.

(Our children)

Our heartfelt yearnings go to our children and grandchildren and the rest of our coming posterity, with sincere hope that they may likewise cherish the joy and gladness of marriage and family life and strengthen the bonds of love and affection, with common vision to the inexplicable eternal glory. We wish that they will continue to build foundations for multi-generational families in the Church, actively participating in its affairs and perhaps also looking forward to attaining their own milestone of enduring marital fidelity and love. It is our wish and hope that no matter the circumstances, no matter all the challenges and struggles all along the difficult routes on the race through life, no matter their failings, they will continually take the unending chances which the Lord offers, through repentance, for them to change course towards the better light that leads to the highest degree in the celestial realms of Heavenly Father’s kingdom.

The whole family

Our bathe in backbreaking strains of those all-encompassing and far-reaching experiences are now past as we conclude our 45 years of connubial marathon. However, still we are in faint as we now embark into another few remaining rounds to the golden finish of our common race. The final grueling tests of life, thus far, might remain to be an enduring challenge as we now walk into the edge of heaven in faltering feet; yet we are unruffled. 

As the tick of the last hour at midnight terminates and the cockcrows in the neighborhood signals the emerging dawn of this most memorable breakthrough in our conjugal partnership of life’s melees, we held hands together in praises to Him who dwells on high; He who gives us the privilege to share His creative powers by giving us the opportunity to bring some of His spirit children into our lives and the opportunity to love, nurture and care for them back into His glorious celestial presence. 

We, therefore, pray in earnestness, and in sincere expressions of gratitude and love for the sustaining power and spiritual strength He has so abundantly blessed us during those formidable days and years of our battles with adversities. We glorify and honor His name and the majesty of His love and kindness and mercy for us, our children and our grandchildren, forever.

LIGHT THE WORLD: GETTING MORE JOY OUT OF THE GIFT HE RECEIVES

By: Norberto Betita 

The wise King Solomon in one of his many inspired declarations, counseled, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6). In this we are taught a simple but distinct pattern of raising and rearing our children into becoming the kind of persons that we wanted them to be. Such a model is applicable not only during the time of the reign of the Kings, but even more appropriate in this very turbulent times when the terrible assaults of the adversary are launched to demonize the youth in their vulnerability. With moral repression becoming a haunting challenge and a barrier for righteous living, it is most vital and imperative that our children be taught the ways of uprightness and virtue.

Our children and youth today are overfed with inflated entertainments on televisions and social media---the internet and smartphones---broadening its impact upon their tender minds and entreating them to embrace those unhealthy values and morals they are peddling. Of such, King Bejamin in the Book of Mormon likewise warned, “And ye will not suffer your children…that they transgress the laws of God, and fight and quarrel one with another, and serve the devil, who is the master of sin, or who is the evil spirit which hath been spoken of by our fathers, he being an enemy to all righteousness.

“But ye will teach them to walk in the ways of truth and soberness; ye will teach them to love one another, and to serve one another.” (Mosiah 4:14-15).

My 12-year-old grandson Rulon Asher has always been generous of his friends and classmates and fellow members of the church his age group. He is loving and patient to his sister and cousins. He has been taught in the ways of righteousness and truth by his parents.

In this time of the joyous season, in celebration of the birth of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, I wanted him to experience greater joy by giving gifts the way Jesus gives. Prior to our Christmas program in the church, I asked him if he would go with me to give food to the beggars as part of our light the world activities for the family. I wanted to teach him how it feels to “succor those that stand in need of [his] succor” and “administer of [his] substance unto him that standeth in need; and…not suffer that the beggar putteth up his petition to [him] in vain…”, as taught by King Benjamin. (See Mosiah 4:16).

He obliged and apprised his parents about our plans. His parents agreed but he was cautioned though that if he is truly willing to give of his entire gift for Christmas to the beggars, he consequently will be depriving himself of the joy that it brings personally to him. He consented without hesitation and honestly told his parents that he is willing to sacrifice for the sake of those who needed the gift more.

In the morning of Saturday. December 22, 2018, in my prayer, I express gratitude to Heavenly Father for my grandson’s having the opportunity to experience for the first time in sharing his personal Christmas gift to the beggars. However, after the party, I somehow forgot about our plans and while we were sitting on the church lobby, Rulon Asher furtively requested his mother to remind me of our scheduled light the world activity. Therefore, Analiza called my attention as regards our planned dinner with the beggars. Then she gave him the cash gift that in my estimate would be able to feed regular meals for at least 7 to 8 persons. Again she reminded him that such was his gift and nothing more, and for the last time tried to validate his willingness to have it given. But he responded with conviction in the affirmative.

And off we went, first along the pedestrian alley near the Roman Catholic Church, but we found none, until we reached the church entrance and found an old woman sitting on a makeshift chair and a paraplegic man on a wheelchair. We talked to them and invited them to have dinner with us at Jollibee. But the old woman refused as it would be difficult for her to push the wheelchair. We assured her that we will be the one to transport them to and from the restaurant, but she declined as she was ashamed. So we just asked her if she would be willing for us to buy food for them, which she willingly agreed. So we went to Jollibee and ordered meals for two and went back and gave it to the suffering needy souls. They were very happy and grateful. I requested that they take a picture with Rulon for a remembrance as the money we used to buy food was actually his gift from his parents for him which he instead offer to be given to them for this Christmas season. The paraplegic was extremely grateful as to try his best effort to grasp my hand with his paralytic arms.

We then went to the park to look for other beggars, but we observed only one. We further went to Metro Surigao Mall to find more, but found none. We went back to the park to invite the one lady we have observed begging. But while on our way, my legs suffered severe cramps and I was in pain. So we rested on a bench and while massaging my legs, we noticed that the beggar was already eating her scanty meal which she had been carrying the first time we observe her. When my cramps was somewhat relieved we approached her while she was counting her money from her coin purse. We observed there were only a few coins. We talked to her and asked about her circumstances. We observed her to be some kind of a woman with special interest. She said she was living alone. We invited her for a dinner at Jollibee. But she was reluctant telling us that she had already eaten her meal. We suggested that if she be willing, we will instead buy for her some groceries, but she rather asked that we buy for her Jollibee for her breakfast the following day. So we went and ordered a special Jollibee meal for her. We also took a picture for a remembrance. And we see the joy that shines in the gentle smile of a woman with special needs, even more than a beggar. She even asked Rulon Asher to let her see her picture, and her countenance even glowed with so much joy and gladness. 

 

We should have feed more, but we found no other, except for those three. Since I was also feeling pains from my cramps and found it difficult to walk, we decided to go home.

While we were on our way home, I saw in Rulon Asher’s countenance the indescribable feeling of joy for having been able to serve those three people who were truly in dire need. He told me how difficult their lives are. He even suggested that we come back other days and find more. While we have our dinner at home and in the presence of his parents I asked him what he feels about our activity. He simply said, “Nice”.

Indeed, it was so nice to feel the joy that comes from doing good. To Rulon Asher it was getting more joy out of the gift he receives by giving it forward to those who needed it most. With such real life experience he learned best that it is indeed “better to give than to receive.” In his regular scripture studies with his parents, he is sure to understand better the words of King Benjamin: “For behold, are we not all beggars? Do we not all depend upon the same Being, even God, for all the substance which we have, for both food and raiment, and for gold, and for silver, and for all the riches which we have of every kind?

“And behold, even at this time, ye have been calling on his name, and begging for a remission of your sins. And has he suffered that ye have begged in vain? Nay; he has poured out his Spirit upon you, and has caused that your hearts should be filled with joy, and has caused that your mouths should be stopped that ye could not find utterance, so exceedingly great was your joy.

“And now, if God, who has created you, on whom you are dependent for your lives and for all that ye have and are, doth grant unto you whatsoever ye ask that is right, in faith, believing that ye shall receive, O then, how ye ought to impart of the substance that ye have one to another.” (Mosiah 4:19-21)

I am aware of the warning to “Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them: otherwise ye have no reward of your Father which is in heaven.” (see Matthew 6:1-4). However, this activity is part of the church initiative to “Light The World,” to show to everybody that no matter our circumstances, no matter our age, no matter our economic conditions in life, we can always extend the light of Christ in service to others and find greater joy by giving as Jesus gives.

For as King Benjamin had further taught: “And again, I say unto the poor, ye who have not and yet have sufficient, that ye remain from day to day; I mean all you who deny the beggar, because ye have not; I would that ye say in your hearts that: I give not because I have not, but if I had I would give.

“And now, if ye say this in your hearts ye remain guiltless, otherwise ye are condemned; and your condemnation is just for ye covet that which ye have not received.

“And now, for the sake of these things which I have spoken unto you—that is, for the sake of retaining a remission of your sins from day to day, that ye may walk guiltless before God—I would that ye should impart of your substance to the poor, every man according to that which he hath, such as feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, visiting the sick and administering to their relief, both spiritually and temporally, according to their wants.” (Mosiah 4:24-26).

When I related part of our experience during my Sacrament Meeting message the following day, Sunday, Rulon Asher covertly hide his tears from his mother. Surely, those were tears not of sorrow and sadness, but of joy and happiness; a symbol of emotional strength that develops as he let go of his personal gift to share the light of Christmas to the hungry needy souls even just during that short moment of their lives. Indeed, his heart was filled with gratitude and exceedingly great joy according to the Lord’s promise, that he found no utterance but tears of gladness. I am most confident that such a life reality experience will long stay in the library of Rulon Asher’s young and tender heart for a remembrance and reference on to his growing years.

LIGHT THE WORLD: OUR LITTLE CHRISTMAS TREE FOR THE POOR AND NEEDY

By: Norberto Betita

The whole year through we had been giving so much for our self and for our loved ones. Perhaps at this blessed season of the year when we celebrate the birth of the infinite giver of all, we need to open our hearts and from the warmth inside its deepest chamber, we give out our love to those whom we care less during the entire time of the year and in our abundance or even in our own deprivations give meaningful gifts to those who are more in need.

During this festive season, with so many in distress, maybe we need to temporarily reduce our budgetary plans for personal gifts and parties; trim down on expensive flickering lights and luxurious decorations on our Christmas trees; and shorten our list and modify our arrangements for sumptuous ‘carte du jour’ on Christmas eve. After all, as Elder Jeffrey R. Holland puts it, "First and forever there was just a little family, without toys or trees or tinsel. With a baby—that’s how Christmas began."

Let us instead uncover the avenue for greater joy by finding those who are in the depths of despair; those who are suffering and in pain; those who are deprived of the necessities of life; those who had been feeling hopeless and depressed; and those whom the Lord would have loved so much to invite and visit if He should have been here on the grand celebration of His birth. Those who are in such complicated temporal conditions were the Lord’s subject in His parable of the sheep and the goats, where He pointed out clearly and unmistakably those whom we are to give of our love and concern and our service. He taught:

“When the Son of man shall come in his glory, and all the holy angels with him, then shall he sit upon the throne of his glory:

“And before him shall be gathered all nations: and he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth his sheep from the goats:

“And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left.

“Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:

“For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:

“Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.

“Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?

“When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?

“Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

“And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

“Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels:

“For I was an hungred, and ye gave me no meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me no drink:

“I was a stranger, and ye took me not in: naked, and ye clothed me not: sick, and in prison, and ye visited me not.

“Then shall they also answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, or athirst, or a stranger, or naked, or sick, or in prison, and did not minister unto thee?

“Then shall he answer them, saying, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me.

“And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal. (Matthew 25:31-46.)

To be assured of an eternal inheritance in God’s Kingdom is so much more to cherish and treasure than the possibility of a consequent painful eternal penalty for failing to care for the least of our brethren as the Lord so plainly admonished. In the parable He obviously gives us the choice whether to do or not to do in so far as caring for the poor and the needy is concerned, but warned us in advance the sure eternal consequences of our choices.

In the world where selfishness is becoming a more common characteristic amongst many of the men and women, it is so delightful and pleasing to note that there are still people who are distinctively generous and benevolent of others as to radiate the pure love of Christ in their lives. These people are particularly well acquainted with the Lord’s commandment, “…Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.” (Matthew 22:39).

Each Christmas time, we do not have any display of expensive large Christmas tree in our home as there are in many homes and malls. We only have a small tree that we can afford. On this 2018 Christmas season, I decided to create a live Christmas tree from my bonsai plants and adorned it with old Christmas decorations and lights. While so many people are busy for their Christmas purchases, we bought groceries not for our Christmas feast, but for some chosen poverty stricken families which we intend to help see and feel the true spirit and real meaning of Christmas.

No longer did we bedeck the base of the tree with boxes of personal gifts, but several packs of food stuffs as gifts for our chosen beneficiaries. This is not only ours to give, but had been in a long time partnership of giving with a very generous benefactor of whom we had been the extended hands, and who herself has her own needs and serious concerns as much as we have. The gift may not have been wrapped in sophistication and elegance, but it is draped with Christlike love and ribboned with fondness and affection that springs halfway across the world.

We did not as yet buy stuffs for our Christmas Eve menu, but for an advance Christmas dinner for at least fifteen needy families at our humble home in time for the 81st birthday today, December 14th, of our most generous donor and partner. She doesn’t prepare a banquet on her birthday at her home, but she prefers to have it celebrated in a faraway place where we could invite those whom the Lord wanted us to invite, especially on this His most celebrated Christmas feast. The Lord, in His parable of the great supper, taught:

“…When thou makest a dinner or a supper, call not thy friends, nor thy brethren, neither thy kinsmen, nor thy rich neighbours; lest they also bid thee again, and a recompence be made thee.

“But when thou makest a feast, call the poor, the maimed, the lame, the blind:

“And thou shalt be blessed; for they cannot recompense thee: for thou shalt be recompensed at the resurrection of the just.” (Luke 14:12-14).

Of course, we are not after the recompense, although we together felt that even in this life we had been receiving continued blessings of great joy and gladness as we gave of ourselves to those in need. This partnership of generous giving is our own expression of our great love for the Lord and Heavenly Father.

Our dear friend’s gifts are hard-earned. As a farmerette she raises cows, goats, chicken, pigs, and sheep, which she sells in time. She plants crops not only for herself, but for others in the neighborhood. She doesn’t employ people to care for her animals, but does all that are necessary by herself even at this time of her old age and failing health. She experienced being kicked and thrown aside and her legs stepped upon by unruly cows while caring for them. She sustains injuries while repairing their shelters during the winter season. Truly her gifts are the products of blood, sweat and tears, a reflection of the Lord’s marvelous divine gift of the Atonement---a great sacrifice of blood, sweat and tears---which commenced on that first Christmas morn when He condescend and thus be born in a stable and laid in a manger and wrapped in swaddling clothes for there was no room for him in the inn (see Luke 12:7); the winding scene being the cruel crucifixion on Calvary’s hill.

I am always in awe and wonder of our dearest friend’s unlimited capacity to love and be concerned for the temporal and spiritual welfare of a group of people, she doesn’t even know, not only on Christmas but on other periods during the year, whenever she felt a need to help. Her love spans no boundaries. Her caring and compassionate heart holds no bar. Indeed, she loves as Jesus loves.

In this exalted season of the year we light the world with our little Christmas tree for the poor and needy as our gift and tribute for the Savior of us all. Notwithstanding the limits imposed upon our old and weary souls by the realities of aging, we hire no one, but instead personally prepared the food that we laid on the table for those whom the Lord described as the least of the brethren. By such humble service, we felt greater joy and gladness as we witness our honored guests enjoying our modest meal offering and leaving with the unpretentious Christmas gift we have prepared, rejoicing and most humbly expressing sincere gratitude. I thought, how wonderful and happier we would have been as a people if each family will take time to invite a needy weary soul for a Christmas dinner and wrap a gift or two as a token of love that emanates from the ultimate gift giver, whose gift of light through His Atonement brightens the way to our eternal destinations.

A MESSAGE FOR THE DEBUTANT

By: Norberto Betita

As my eldest granddaughter KayAn now turns from an amazing young woman to a gorgeous beautiful lady, I also felt like descending in a cliff with faltering feet and trembling knees, hardly grasping the breath of life. While KayAn blooms forward with youthful vigor and vitality, my energy and stamina that once run the length of 35 laps in the Vasquez oval and the 12 kilometer distance to our town of San Francisco now fades in natural deterioration like a vintage machine. While her intellectual brilliance is impressively evolving and exponentially expanding, my mental state of recollection is now somewhat waning and am now fairly bereft of academic nerves. While her physical senses remain virtually in perfect condition, I slowly suffer from a blurred vision and hearing impairment and to some extent my tongue seems to have been twisted as to forfeit my oratorical and phonetic virtues. Yet these are fundamentally life’s forlorn realities which all of us must pass.

In any way, however, this does not mean that we be dismayed by the turning tides of these events in life. We should value the glorious times of youth as much as we should treasure the deteriorating effects of old age. We all need to know that life is one eternal round.

KayAn Betita Palma

The legendary Shakespeare compared a youthful life to a summer’s day---brilliant and wonderfully beautiful---arguing that the young woman’s ‘eternal summer’, or prime, will not fade no matter the refining tests of life; nor does it lose its hold on the beauty the youth owns. Not even death, the grim reaper, is able to boast that the youth walks in the shadow of death, not even when the youth grows to a ripened age like me, not even towards death, for the beauty of youth springs from a timeless origin with destination towards immortality. And thus he wrote in Sonnet 18:

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate:
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer’s lease hath all too short a date;
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature’s changing course untrimm'd;
But thy eternal summer shall not fade,
Nor lose possession of that fair thou own’st;
Nor shall death brag thou wander’st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou grow’st:
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.

KayAn’s high points in life, or what the poet described as “eternal summer,” is still to be unearthed in an ongoing flight far into the verdant landscape of future prospects and on to the realms of success. She may have magnificently survived the harrowing encounters with trials and adversities early in her vulnerable youthful life, but such was only a short chapter of her long story. This march that we witnessed today is not of success, but a commencement of her yet long unfolding journey far afield the domains of life’s real battlefield. As she enters the world’s competitive amphitheater, there will still be more defeats and wins, failures and successes, battles and victories, but as in her study of the Old Testament in the Seminary she knew as did the preacher in the Book of Ecclesiastes, “...that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all” (Ecclesiastes 9:11). Yes, there will be sorrows in defeats and joys in winnings; there will be despairs attendant to failures and laurels that come of success; there will still be more Goliaths to battle, and she knows that she needs to be a David in order to win the most coveted victories.

In this inauguration and unveiling of the new and more challenging episode of her life, she needs to understand, that goals and objective are the links that will connect her best efforts to her desired achievements. She needs to know that one could not attain a wish to study in a premier university if the effort is only equivalent for a local college. One could not progress to the highest attainable degree if the toil and slog is only for an average vocational attainment. One could not achieve the glory and wonder of success if the sweat of labor is measly and inadequate. One could not obtain the full blessings from God with superficial obedience to His Commandments. It is only in rising from every fall; overcoming daunting failures; and swimming against the heaving waves of life’s stormy seas that one could find greatest delight in the glory of triumph and victory. It is only by obedience to God’s unenforceable laws that predicated blessings are poured out in bountiful abundance. As Julie Andrews, in the movie The Sound of Music, most brilliantly put it, “I will do better than my best.” I am sure that KayAn will have these truths always kept in the cellar of her mind and written in the tablet of her heart.

Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “The world is all gates, all opportunities, strings of tension waiting to be struck.” These immeasurable gates of opportunities, however, are not just closed by strings of tensions as to be easily opened by striking. But the best of these opportunities are locked and bolted as to need a refined and sophisticated key to access. And that superior key is education.

She is young and is an easy target of the lure and wheedling of the world and her youthful vulnerability is generally exposed to the mad rush of worldly indulgence. Her life’s wandering may still cover more of life’s stormy seas and a ride on life’s titanic in the vast ocean of survival. She knew that this life is a probationary state, a tryout of an enduring race, a contest of persistence and fortitude, a test of faith and courage. She needs to be brave and valiant as she now faces the escalating challenges and mounting adversities as she takes every demanding lap all along the race through the circle of life. Elton John described this tough and defying trials in a song from the popular animated movie Lion King, thus:

From the day we arrive on the planet
And blinking, step into the Sun
There's more to be seen than can ever be seen
More to do than can ever be done…

In the circle of life
It's the wheel of fortune
It's the leap of faith
It's the band of hope
Till we find our place
On the path unwinding
In the circle of life

Some of us fall by the wayside
And some of us soar to the stars
And some of us sail through our troubles
And some have to live with the scars

There's far too much to take in here
More to find than can ever be found
But the Sun rolling high through the sapphire sky
Keeps great and small on the endless round

Indeed, in the circle of life, KayAn will have to experience defeat, she may be downed by failure, and she may often feel frustrated and drained as she scuffle and wrestle with setbacks. Yet these are all necessary for her to develop the muscles to hurdle impediments and negative forces along the way to her goals and aspirations. Ezra Taft Benzon once said, “It is not in the pinnacle of success or ease where men and women grow most. It is down the valley of heartaches and disappointments and reverses, where men and women grow into strong characters.” And she needs to understand that her character will shape her destiny.

KayAn, however, should be consoled, that in all her failings and shortcomings, she is promised that there will come the joy of trying again and again; until shadows turns into sunshine; until the storm eventually calms; until sorrow transforms to gladness.

Yet beyond and above all that she can achieve in this life, there is nothing comparable to Heavenly Father’s indisputable promise of eternal life and mansions of glory in His Celestial Kingdom. This belief stands as the enduring foundation of her reason to be faithful and fearless of the seemingly insurmountable but equally luxuriant future. The Lord reminds: “Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.” I know as she also believes that if she remains faithful and true to her covenants, God will be at the helm of her voyage to the blissful eternal shore.

To my ever dearest granddaughter KayAn, the debutant, as you now enter formally for the first time in the society of single adults, on this your 18th birthday, it is my earnest wish and hope that as you scale the sloping hills of your dreams, you will be able to see in perfect view the magnified contrast between the dark valleys below and the gleaming rays of a promising sunshine decorated with marvelously colored rainbow above the mount. I pray in humility that each dawning day of your continuing journey through the circle of life may provide you with constant renewal of strength to move on no matter the barriers; that you will be able to harness the spiritual gifts which the Lord has so abundantly blessed you for your best interest and that of your loved ones; and that you may have the needed faith and courage to endure the uphill route to the apex of success and to the zenith of a glorious victory.

I earnestly pray, that you will always remember the undeniable truth that while it is true that you and your siblings and we your ancestors have a common everlasting beginnings and you were born on earth with the same parentage; that the blood pumped by the heart into your system is from the same source; that our divine and genetic DNAs are the same; we all have our personal differences. That such an evident reality is to help us better understand the true purpose of life and the reason for living. That it is apparently made part of our lives to help us to support each other in our weaknesses and imperfections; bear each other’s burdens; and binding ourselves with love that extends into the wonders of the glorious eternity.

HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY OUR DEARLY BELOVED FIRSTBORN GRANDDAUGHTER KAYAN BETITA PALMA! We love you very much!