SERVING WITH REAL INTENT

By: Norberto Betita

When youthful vigor wears out into the shadows of aging in the same manner as the brilliant light of day in sunset fades, one common question comes into the mind, “Could have I done better?”

As sure as the range of sunset imperceptibly snatch the light of day and swallow the remaining rays into the night’s darkness; so old age renders the feet hard to steady and engenders the hands to weaken its grasp and the old and weary soul sits in a couch of exhaustion reflecting and ever wanting to know how satisfying the journey in mortality has been before being swallowed up beyond the veil of tears. In daily serious moments of spiritual meditation and personal evaluation the lyrics of a hymn echo: “Have I done any good in the world today? (Hymn No. 223).”

Such questions were often raised to me by my beloved Letty, perhaps out of real concern how she had performed her role---as a daughter, a wife, a mother, women leader and gospel teacher---in the pageant played in this immense stage of mortality. She wanted to make sure before she finally leaves this frail existence that her performance qualify her for an eternal inheritance. She’s kind of asking, “How do I know if I’m doing all that I can as a requisite for God’s grace, as we are told that ‘it is by grace that we are saved after all we can do’ (2 Nephi 25:23)?” 

While we both know that only God can judge the measure and adequacy of our performance, I have to reassure her that in the many roles she had been foreordained to undertake in this great drama of life, she had been always serving with real intent, performing with superior enthusiasm and portraying with outstanding dedication, resulting to some significant moments of spiritual transcendence.

Despite her many different roles, she had patiently cared for her ailing mother---whose Parkinson’s disease caused her mental deterioration---until she breathed her last.

Being a wife, she had been to me a miracle. As in the movie The Bodyguard, “Our love story is a difficult one. It’s impossible to convey it in a few words.” Therefore about her role as a wife I have written much and have personally expressed each day my deepest love and appreciation for her total devotion to our marital vows and eternal covenants and her dedication to her spousal duties. 

I could justifiably describe her motherhood as angelic. Her commitment and tenacity in the performance of her maternal duties are obviously unmissable. During troubling times when days seemed blue and nights darkened by anxieties and deep concern over a child in a hassle, and when sobbing in the wee hours of the night robs the needed restful sleep, she would lovingly lean on my shoulders and longingly yearn for an answer to the same question the rich young man once asked Jesus, “What lack I yet? (Matthew 10:20).” Only her understanding of the truth that perfection is not of this life and the fact that there are limitations to what we can do in mortality, provide comfort. She knows that motherly perseverance needs to endure a lifetime.

While happiness in our family life satisfies our parental yearnings and fills the void of worldly vanities and human wishes, still she extends some of her generous time spaces in service to God and His children. In her heart always rings the words of Elder. D. Todd Christofferson, “The greatest service we can provide to others in this life, beginning with those of our own family, is to bring them to Christ.” It is of this service to others and the church that I wanted to pay tribute of her on this her 68th birthday.

Through the years she had voluntarily served as called upon in an attitude of “charity out of a pure heart, and of a good conscience and of faith unfeigned” (1Timothy 1:5). A service motivation that came from inside-out; an attitude of ‘what can she best give for others’ and the people with whom she was called to serve.

While most in the world “the prevailing concern seems to be, “What can I get; what’s in it for me?” as observed by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, her voluntary service is one of selflessness and love. Throughout our membership in the Church, she had an almost unbroken service calls in the Relief Society and other auxiliaries, whether it be in the presidency or as gospel teacher. Even until recently when limbs are already weakened and knees feebled, she had been called and had been serving for some time as Institute teacher, tutoring young adults some of whom were more secularly educated than she was. For such reason, she diligently prepared her lessons in such a way that she will not be so much at variance with her student’s capabilities. She studied her lessons from the very night immediately following the end of her Saturday evening classes, and daily thereafter, apart from her study of our Sunday school and Relief Society lessons. Throughout those spaces of her precious times she had offered and is offering in service to God’s children without expecting for any reward in return. Her dedication goes down deep into the marrow of her bones.

She lives by the principle that “when ye are in the service of your fellow beings, ye are only in the service of your God” (Mosiah 2:17). She is always and ever true to her commitment to serve. I found her motive to serve as a typical characterization of the admonition of Nehpi to “…follow the Son, with full purpose of heart, acting no hypocrisy and no deception before God, but with real intent, repenting of your sins, witnessing unto the Father that ye are willing to take upon you the name of Christ...” (2 Nephi 31:13).

Her unrelenting service prompts her to adopt Jacob’s “boldness of speech” (Jacob 2:7) as she taught Relief Society and Institute students about living the gospel. She wanted to impress upon them the need to mature in the gospel and to understand the import of what she teaches about the obvious imbalance between worldly pleasures and the eternal, joyful consequences of living God’s eternal plan for His children. Some might have been offended of her boldness at times, yet many more loved her for being forthright and loving in her expressions and testimony of the truth.

Through the years she had been loved and respected by the Relief Society Sisters. At times she is surprised by hugs, in public square, from dear old sisters who had been long lost in the church to inactivity---a sign that she had always been remembered.

In times of death of a sister, she is always the first in local Relief Society leader’s thoughts to assist in dressing the endowed deceased, even offering her temple clothing to be used by those who died unprepared---it matters not whether a replacement is promised or never at all.

At 68 she is still actively and diligently serving her children and grandchildren she loves so dearly and the people of whom she was called to serve. While career retirement is a right and privilege, she believes that service to family and others of God’s children is an imperative lifetime duty of Christ’s disciples. Her love and concern for me as her covenant partner for time and all eternity grow even stronger as the dawn of life is drawn slowly to its sunset. She is not chasing happiness like an elusive butterfly. She knows and believes that as she “turn [her] attention to other [people]” beyond herself, “it will come and sit softly on [her] shoulder” (Henry David Thoreau).

Yet in some reflective moments she would again ask, “Have I really done good enough?” The words of the legendary Sophocles remind: “We must wait till evening to know how pleasant the day has been.” And when the night came down and while our eyes are still evading the need for a good night sleep, we come to the sad realization that not anyone of us can tell how fulfilling our lifetime of service has been until our final hour on earth. Her serving with real intent and with full purpose of heart, however, reassures her that she had acted well her part and her performance in the immense stage of the mortal play can be acceptable to the eminent Divine Director.

HAPPY, HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY to the best thing that ever happened to me; the echoes of my eternity; the beauty that wrinkles never dared to diminish; the miracle of my life; the indomitable queen of my family kingdom; my precious everdearest Letty! I hope these expressions best substitute the daily magic phrase that I most sincerely convey to your ever hearing ears each morning. I wish to God that you will be blessed with more time spaces to serve Him and His children to satisfy the earnest longings of your heart for exaltation, as it is indeed, "by grace that we are saved after all we can do."