By: Norberto G. Betita
Life begins at 40 and one need to be grateful to be able to cut across the line or leap the hurdle of life’s difficult border of middle age, so they say. Indeed, many were not lucky enough to cross the intersection as to cut short their journey. But I don’t believe that it has something to do with this myth.
Forty years ago, on April 25, 1975, I was on duty in an island as a security guard when I was informed that my wife in mainland Surigao City had given birth. I was overjoyed and with so much excitement, I requested to cut short my tour of duty and immediately applied for a leave of absence. Waiting at the jetty for a commercial pump boat to Surigao City seemed so long and only intensified my anxiousness and enthusiasm to see my firstborn child. My anxiety ended as I boarded for an hour and a half trip to Surigao City, and my joy was full as I saw and carried in my arms my first born Hazel, a name long before chosen by her mother. She was born in a lowly circumstance at the home of my parents-in-law. Not even a cushioned mattress was available for Hazel and my dearest Letty to lie on. However, we are so much grateful that she was born normal and very healthy.
Since then she has grown healthy, strong, beautiful, and brilliant. In her childhood, she was spoiled by the greatest love that we have for her and of her grandparents endearing affection. She is loved by neighbours for her lady-like countenance and actions. Yet, despite our continued nurturing and rearing, she turned out to be at times stubborn. After graduating from high school, she qualified to study at the University of the Philippines. Not many brilliant youths from public high school, had qualified. She stayed for two years until her mother eventually pulled her out from the University. She eventually graduated with a degree in Management Accounting from a local college and passed a government Civil Service Eligibility.
She married the youngest son of a family friend, a returned missionary and was sealed together as a family in the Manila Philippines Temple. She has been educated and should have been qualified for employment, but her loving husband had placed her at the highest pedestal of her rightful calling to perform the greatest and divine role of motherhood. They enjoyed life together living with us while her husband was still finishing college. They lived a happy family life in the midst of penury. Four wonderful, beautiful and intelligent children were born which bring joy and gladness into the circle and developed in her an enduring virtue of motherhood. They were given a taste of affluence, but instead of affording comfort for the family, the provider eventually “fall into temptation and a snare, and into many foolish and hurtful lusts, which drown men in destruction and perdition” (1 Timothy 6:9). Life’s storms started to blow hard and rains continued to slump heavy downpours upon her and her children’s path of tragedy. After 14 years of marriage, her dream for an eternal family was lost in oblivion. Gone were the joy and gladness the family once enjoyed and savored. Estranged were the innocent children who suffered the anguish of alienation. She found shelter back in the old nest of her childhood and for her children a protective grand family.
Now she is looking back to the experiences of her youthful past as she nurtures and rears her teenage girls and baby boys who are looking forward to the future bereft of a father’s guiding hands. Her challenges of the past and of the present are vast and varied, but she had endured and is enduring well even the diversifying magnitude of her trials. For the first time in her life, she has to make use of her long stagnant professional training and education to help provide for the immediate needs of her children with assistance from the extended and benevolent hands of siblings.
She may have lost her king, but it doesn’t mean that she will lose her queenly promises. Elder James E. Talmage declared this assurance: "Then shall woman be recompenses in rich measure for all the injustice that womanhood has endured in mortality. Then shall woman reign by Divine right, a queen in the resplendent realm of her glorified state...Mortal eye cannot see nor mind comprehend, the beauty, glory, and majesty of a righteous woman made perfect in the celestial Kingdom of God." (Quoted by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, To My Friends, pp. 238). God in His infinite wisdom and love gives His children every chance for joy and happiness in this life and in the hereafter. Her children will have the same opportunity if they all remain faithful and true. And the ever loving and merciful God has promised that He will always be at hand.
The storms that cut into the bonds of their family relationship will eventually dissipate and a new day will come to bring a lovely and delightful sunshine. The rains of life may ever follow their path, yet after each rain there will always shine the gorgeous and exquisite rainbow that will provide hope and assurance that life will always be profoundly enjoyable and a bridge towards future opportunities will continually be open.
Today, as she celebrates her 40th birthday and begins a new life, we express our best wishes for continued faith and hope as she walks with her children toward the unknown future of life’s journey. May she be blessed with daily strength and power to overcome the great and enormous challenges of a single mother of four. May God grant her hearts righteous yearnings for things of eternal consequence. May her joy and gladness be full as she leads a life of righteousness and virtue for her young and growing children to emulate. May the pains of estrangement disperse and a new hope of a dawning joyful life kicks off. May peace and love fills her heart for her children of whom she risked her only life. May the sunshine after the storm and the rainbow after the rain bring in heavenly powers for the best possibilities and prospects for her and the children. May God allow for our best and earnest wishes to be fulfilled for our ever dearest and dearly beloved Hazel, the first born.
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