by: Norberto Betita
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| THE OLD NEST |
The old nest where we taught our children how to find strength to fly even against the swirling winds of adversities in the realm of mortal life is now deteriorated. However, its fundamental amenities where the then young children were nestled are still functional and are basically available. The memories of those long years of nestling remains afresh and even revitalized by the visits and home coming of children now grown with family units of their own. Oftentimes they come back carrying the burdens of life and wanting to have their wings fixed and restored. Somehow in their independent journey on life’s open field they have gone far beyond the limits set and taught by the nestlers; and thus experience reverses and setbacks. There is truth in what Spencer W. Kimbal had to say:
"I have sometimes seen children of good families rebel, resist, stray, sin, and even actually fight God. In this they bring sorrow to their parents, who have done their best to set in movement a current and to teach and live as examples. But I have repeatedly seen many of these same children, after years of wandering, mellow, realize what they have been missing, repent, and make great contribution to the spiritual life of their community. The reason I believe this can take place is that, despite all the adverse winds to which these people have been subjected, they have been influenced still more, and much more than they realized, by the current of life in the homes in which they were reared. When, in later years, they feel a longing to recreate in their own families the same atmosphere they enjoyed as children, they are likely to turn to the faith that gave meaning to their parents’ lives. [CR, October 1974, 159; or “Ocean Currents and Family Influences,” Ensign, November 1974, 110]
During the most recent season of cheer we have a home coming and reunion for our children and grandchildren. It was such a joy to gather together on a Monday before the Christmas Day and another before the New Year’s Day for family home evenings. The living room once occupied by eight is now crowded with seventeen. The joyful memories of those days when all our children and a foster daughter are still single came back to us as we parents taught our children and grandchildren lessons from the same Gospel of Jesus Christ and gave our parental messages for all. We played the same games we played many years ago, and we sang songs, even primary songs and hymns we long since memorized as we are punished for losing each game. We enjoyed our games, even our 7-month old grandson on the lap of his elder sister joined with us in our joy and gladness as we laugh and sing.
"I have sometimes seen children of good families rebel, resist, stray, sin, and even actually fight God. In this they bring sorrow to their parents, who have done their best to set in movement a current and to teach and live as examples. But I have repeatedly seen many of these same children, after years of wandering, mellow, realize what they have been missing, repent, and make great contribution to the spiritual life of their community. The reason I believe this can take place is that, despite all the adverse winds to which these people have been subjected, they have been influenced still more, and much more than they realized, by the current of life in the homes in which they were reared. When, in later years, they feel a longing to recreate in their own families the same atmosphere they enjoyed as children, they are likely to turn to the faith that gave meaning to their parents’ lives. [CR, October 1974, 159; or “Ocean Currents and Family Influences,” Ensign, November 1974, 110]
During the most recent season of cheer we have a home coming and reunion for our children and grandchildren. It was such a joy to gather together on a Monday before the Christmas Day and another before the New Year’s Day for family home evenings. The living room once occupied by eight is now crowded with seventeen. The joyful memories of those days when all our children and a foster daughter are still single came back to us as we parents taught our children and grandchildren lessons from the same Gospel of Jesus Christ and gave our parental messages for all. We played the same games we played many years ago, and we sang songs, even primary songs and hymns we long since memorized as we are punished for losing each game. We enjoyed our games, even our 7-month old grandson on the lap of his elder sister joined with us in our joy and gladness as we laugh and sing.
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| BONSAI TREES AROUND THE HOUSE |
As we sat together at our crowded living room and read and study each day the scripture, particularly from the Book of Mormon, we were also brought to the wonderful memories of those early years when all our children are young and are still within the shelter of our nest. How wonderful to discuss together the Gospel as some sat on the mattress flat on the floor. Little children seemed not listening, but we are confident that they are learning more than we think. We are humbled by the prayer of each child as they are assigned, petitioning Heavenly Father for guidance and protection mentioning the names of each family unit and each single member of the family.
Family home evenings, family scripture study and family prayer are activities that have since strengthened our family bond. Yet it is never a guarantee that when our children grow in maturity and have families of their own that they will be free from life’s adversities and challenges. They have to experience their own tests as much as others of God’s children have which are necessary for growth and eventual sanctification. But if they will make better use of the lessons learned from their original nest, they will surely be able to find easy resolves to every bit of trials and sorrows that they will have to encounter as they traverse the main thoroughfare of their voyage to eternity. Robert D. Hales declared, “The First Presidency taught that by teaching and rearing children in gospel principles, parents can protect their families from corrosive elements. They further counseled parents and children “to give highest priority to family prayer, family home evening, gospel study and instruction, and wholesome family activities. However worthy and appropriate other demands or activities may be, they must not be permitted to displace the divinely-appointed duties that only parents and families can adequately perform” (First Presidency letter, 11 Feb. 1999; cited in Church News, 27 Feb. 1999, 3.)
Family home evenings, family scripture study and family prayer are activities that have since strengthened our family bond. Yet it is never a guarantee that when our children grow in maturity and have families of their own that they will be free from life’s adversities and challenges. They have to experience their own tests as much as others of God’s children have which are necessary for growth and eventual sanctification. But if they will make better use of the lessons learned from their original nest, they will surely be able to find easy resolves to every bit of trials and sorrows that they will have to encounter as they traverse the main thoroughfare of their voyage to eternity. Robert D. Hales declared, “The First Presidency taught that by teaching and rearing children in gospel principles, parents can protect their families from corrosive elements. They further counseled parents and children “to give highest priority to family prayer, family home evening, gospel study and instruction, and wholesome family activities. However worthy and appropriate other demands or activities may be, they must not be permitted to displace the divinely-appointed duties that only parents and families can adequately perform” (First Presidency letter, 11 Feb. 1999; cited in Church News, 27 Feb. 1999, 3.)
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| VIEW OF THE SUNSET AT THE TERRACE |
The eight-sitter oblong dining table is still very functional although the original chairs where already worn-out and replaced with surplus ones. It is not only a place for family dining at mealtime but it is likewise utilized as a venue for family council meetings when our children are still young and problems and concerns are in magnitude. It is where we always sit in council as a family in prayerful discussions of applicable solutions to our problems in accordance with gospel principles. During our most recent reunion we sat together around that same old dining table with our children and their spouses as we talk about each other’s marital problems and relationship concerns together. Peace abound as sincere prayer was invoked. It was such a wonderful reverberating moment to teach the same standards and values from lessons of long ago, and share our valued experiences of calm and winds, sunshine and shadows, joys and sorrows which paint and adorn the portrait of our 40 years of marital relationship. As it was in the past each has to express and share whatever concerns they have and the whole family suggest solutions and offer resolves. Tenderness of feelings abides as each admits fault and promise change unto repentance. There was joy as each couple relates their own stories of failures and successes and continual marital adjustments. Tears filled our eyes as meditative benediction was offered in conclusion. I agree with David O. McKay as he said: ”The restored gospel teaches that our homes should become warm nests where children may be protected and grow into noble men and women; where...old age [may find] repose; where prayer will find an altar.” (Church News, 11 Mar. 1961, p. 15, quoted by Franklin D. Richards.)
The five bedrooms no longer could accommodate the growing posterity, but we are happy that while we crowd together on mats and mattresses laid on available spaces we still could sleep soundly. Despite the seemingly uncomfortable atmosphere, each of our children and grandchildren had the feeling that they are in a safe sanctuary in an old and deteriorated nest called home.
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